Need help now?

13 year old daughter wont answer my phone calls

Discussion forum for parents in Australia

13 year old daughter wont answer my phone calls


13 year old daughter wont answer my phone calls

My 13 year old daughter ignores my phone calls and sends me text messages to say she does'nt want to speak to me. Because i have struggled with mental health, i have found it hard to stay strong with rules. She does whatever she wants and her father is on her side. He won't agree to rules with me so we have constant conflict in the house. 

She speaks down to me and tells me she is so angry with me and does'nt want to speak to me. I get so upset because i have no parental rights in my home that i don't want to parent her anymore. I have become scared to stand up for my rights with her as a mother so much now that i am starting to avoid her. I want to leave the house all the time and i'm not coping. My daughter sometimes won't come home after school and then won't take my calls. 

I am very depressed and lost


Re: 13 year old daughter wont answer my phone calls

Message contains a hyperlink

Hey @Harris 

Thank you for posting and sharing on the Forums.

I just want to say that it sounds like you are dealing with a really challenging situation and your feelings and thoughts are valid. Your daughters behaviours sound like they make parenting her really hard but I sense that you really love her and care about her a lot. Reaching out like you are demonstrates your a mother looking to understand her daughter and support her as a parent. And her father being on her side and not agreeing to rules is making that even more challenging for you.

You are demonstrating resilience and a strong character when faced with resistance from you family and it takes courage to talk about things like this openly and how it affects you. I encourage you to acknowledge your efforts so far and consider that there are things in life that you can't control even when you are in a position as a parent to care for your daughter. And sharing that responsibility with another parent and dealing with different parenting styles and worldviews.

I have a couple of articles for you that might help with effective communication and building trust if you feel it is beneficial to read them. Research is a good place to start and learn from the experience of other rather than doing in all alone. I wonder do you have a trusted person you can talk to about this who understands your situation or knows you as a caring mother? Please see the articles below:

How have you been coping with this up to now or what have you done in the past that might help you through this challenging time? There a services in the community and online that can help you and provide a safe space to talk about this with some who understands your challenges. It might be worth looking for a parents support group in your local area by Googling a few search options. Or maybe give some of the below online services a call and have a look at the list of services listed be ReachOut:

I'm going to send you an email too just to check in with you privately and ask a few questions and offer some support there.

Remember to acknowledge that you are doing the best you can right now under really challenging situations. Teenage years and not easy for a lot of parents and some solidarity with other parents could provide some relief and solutions to your challenges with both your daughter and her father. Please continue to post on the Forums and the community can support you here too.

Take care