Help how to approach my 17 yo girl who always post on social media about me expressing her anger

[LS1975]

I need help. My daughter dont talk much word to me. she just stayed in her room and if I talk to her she gets mad. Now I just knew from a friend that she's posting so much negative messages about me on tiktok. When I asked her why she did that she dont answer. I dont know what to do. I dont know how to approach her. She just stayed in her room. Please help me

[Erin_RO]

Hi @LS1975,

Welcome to the ReachOut community, and thank you for sharing what you are going through at the moment. I’m really sorry to hear that you’re going through a difficult time with your daughter. It must have been incredibly hurtful to discover negative messages about yourself have been posted on social media. It's understandable that you are wanting to find a way to address this issue and improve your relationship with your daughter, and I am really glad that you have reached out for support with this.

From the difficulties you have described with approaching your daughter about what has happened, it sounds like communication between you and your daughter has become quite a challenging aspect of your relationship. I wanted to share this article we have on effective communication with teenagers that I hope will be useful in providing you with some strategies for approaching difficult conversations with your daughter.

I also wanted to acknowledge that as a parent, it’s well within your rights to set boundaries, both in terms of behaviour within the family, and online. It might be helpful to establish clear expectations and consequences for certain behaviours, while also explaining your perspective and allowing for your daughter's perspective to be heard as well. Boundaries can look different for every family - if you feel comfortable to share, I am curious to hear about your experiences with boundary setting within your family. We also have an article on setting boundaries with your teenager here, if you’re interested.

I am mindful that parenting can emotionally draining, especially during times of resistance or conflict. It's really important to prioritise your well-being and take care of yourself during these times. Do you have any self-care practices and supports that you have found effective in managing the emotional challenges of parenting?