High school junior school refusal

[Happydaughter]

Hello
My daughter has been using excuses to leave school early, or not to go to school or miss a class or two. She started this behavior in middle school and carried over into her freshman year and again in her junior year(sophomore year was online due to covid). She has expressed since middle school that she’s not happy with the school(s). In a couple days, we are touring a new school and she will shadow a student for the day. I have talked to her about ‘missing school and or classes’ cannot continue nor can it happen at the new school, if she does transfer schools. I truly don’t know if she will change this behavior by transferring schools. Her current student high school (9-12) population is well over 1,000 and the new school which is k-12, is approximately 500 total. She is seeing a new counselor and has met with her once, with another session scheduled next week. How or what is the best approach to work through this with my daughter so that she is a confident, resilient and happy teenager moving forward?

[Bre-RO]

Hi @Happydaughter thank you for coming here to get support for your daughter. It's clear that you're a loving parent, and I believe that trumps all the challenges teen years bring. However, that's not to say that this situation wouldn't be concerning for you. 

We've noticed school refusal has been an increasingly common experience for young people and their parents, so we created a dedicated space for parents going through the same thing to connect. Click through to that thread here if you're interested in having a read. 

We also have some great content on school refusal: 

How to help a teen who doesn't want to go to school 

Learn how to tackle the school system confidently

It's really positive that you've connected your daughter with a counsellor - hopefully, those sessions will help you both understand what it is about school that is making your daughter unhappy. Do you have some good support people around you at the moment?