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Keeping my daughter “contained”

Keeping my daughter “contained”

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Keeping my daughter “contained”

Hi. Just after some tips and advice on how other parents keep their loved ones contained or safe. My daughter is struggling & is dealing with trauma but I’m finding it hard steering her into doing other things to get her distracted for awhile off her depression so she has short bouts of “normalcy”. Money is abit tight. I even get her cooking dinner to distract her at night etc. any advice?
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Re: Keeping my daughter “contained”

Hi @mugs1170 , 


It's nice to hear from you again, how did you cope over the Xmas period? 


I think that cooking can be a really good activity/ way to distract ourselves from negative thoughts etc, i think that sounds like a really good idea, especially if it's something that your daughter enjoys. Coincidentally, I was listening to a podcast yesterday with Marian Keyes, who's a really well known author - she experienced a bout of very severe depression several years ago, and baking ended up being something that she found really helpful in a time where she could hardly function. 


Do you have any family favourite recipes that you could cook with her/ teach her how to make? That could be a good way to ease her into it/ spend time together without having to make conversation. 


Another thought I had is something like gardening/ tending a small veggie patch or raised garden bed (or even a few pot plants if you don't have space) .  I also know that some people find things like adult colouring books really helpful and distracting, you can often pick these up super cheaply from op shops. 


You say that you want to keep her safe, are you concerned about her safety when she's not at home with you?  

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Re: Keeping my daughter “contained”

Yes I’m concerned about her when I’m not home with her etc. this week has been extra difficult for her as she’s dealing with trauma. Today was not a good day for her & she expressed suicidal tendencies!! So now I’m extra alert! I guess when this happens & you don’t know your options on who to call etc, it’s really tough as I can only help her so much! Also since I also have a mental illness I know the frustrations of getting help especially on a weekend or anytime really. So I guess I’m struggling with containing her at present which is sad for me.

Re: Keeping my daughter “contained”

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Hi @mugs1170 


If you don't mind me asking, what do you mean when you say your daughter is showing suicidal tendencies. Is she self-harming? Or having thoughts of suicide?


You mentioned money is a bit tight at the moment so I wanted to make you aware of free counselling services that may be suitable for your daughter. We have an "urgent help" page here on our Youth forum. All of these services operate 24/7 and provide free counselling to Australians. I'd encourage you to encourage your daughter to make contact with one of these services if she's feeling quite distressed.


You mentioned having mental health issues yourself so it's important that you're also seeking the right support. The services I linked for your daughter are also suitable for you. The helpline ParentLine is also a good option as they provide free and confidential counselling and support on any parenting issues. The number for Parentline differs per state. Scroll to the bottom of this page to see which number to call if you're interested. 


Some universities also offer low-cost counselling options, so it might be worth checking our some of the universities in your area. It might also be an idea to search for bulk-billing psychologists in your area, that way you can get 10 free sessions for the year (You'll need to book in with your GP to get a mental health care plan to access those 10 free sessions though). If you're interested in this option, it might be a good idea to start by seeing whether there's a Headspace Centre near you as I believe they specialize in youth mental health and a bulk-bill. Check out their website for more information here

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