Need help now?

My adult son

Discussion forum for parents in Australia

Reply
Casual scribe
Mv161705

My adult son

I'm am concerned for, adult son who is paralyzed with anxiety regarding his working functioning future.
Highlighted
Casual scribe
Mv161705

Re: My adult son

Sorry, we have already tried MANY psychologists, some psychiatrists, meds which have had minimal effect. He is on one anti anxiety med but now refuses to go on any further meds. His self medicated with natural a substance that isnt totally legal!! His father and l are extremely distressed and deeply saddened by his situation. We need as much help as possible.
Scribe
Saturday

Re: My adult son

Is there anyone in his life to act as a mentor?  Who isn't a parent?

Contributor
Sophia-RO

Re: My adult son

Message contains a hyperlink

Hello @Mv161705  I am sorry to hear about the situation that you and your son are in. It sounds like things have been tough for a while. It also sounds like you care a lot about your son as you have been getting him various professional supports and treatment. It is a shame that he has not found the treatment to be that effective so far. Is there anything in particular that he has found to be somewhat helpful so fa

 

It sounds like there is a lot for you and your partner to deal with. I am wondering if you have much support around you that you can talk to about what you are going through? Parentline is a free and confidential counselling service that you could use if you wanted to talk things through with a professional.

Star contributor
Janine-RO

Re: My adult son

Message contains a hyperlink

Hi @Mv161705 , 

 

I was just reading through your thread, and wanted to check in and see how you, and your family, are travelling? 

 

It can be so hard as a parent when our child is struggling, no matter how old they are. This post really resonated with me on a personal level - I have two kids myself, and I also had some tough years myself in my late teens/ early twenties, where I struggled hugely with anxiety. 

 

I'm hearing how much you love your son, and I imagine it must be so hard not knowing how to help him, or what you can do to help him through this very difficult season. 

 

I'm curious, you mention he's had help from different services before and also uses other substances to help (if you're referring to marijuana, that's definitely something that's pretty common , and is often a form of self medicating). 

 

Has he ever had help from someone who works in vocational counselling/ rehabiliation counselling at all, or from a professional like an Occupational Therapist?  

 

A skilled mental health OT can be a really useful part of someone's recovery journey- along with career counselling, if he's feeling a bit lost about the future in general. 

 

We've also got a resource which may be helpful on our ReachOut Parents page, which looks at a lot of different options that are out there, for when someone's already had a bit of professional help, but is still struggling to find a path forward. It was written by an experienced clinical psychologist, and has some great tips and services that may be helpful for you: 

 

My teen's professional help didn't work- what next? 

 

You mention that your son's really stressed about his future- and that's something we do hear quite a lot from young people, especially in the last year or so. It's a really stressful, uncertain, and frightening time for a lot of young people who are just embarking on adult life- we have some great resources on our ReachOut Youth page that may be helpful here;

 

How to handle fear about the future: a guide

 

How to mostly stop worrying about the future of work 

 

 

 

It can be incredibly difficult as a parent when your child isn't going so well, and I know that in my life, the most stressful seasons for me have been when one of my children has been really unwell. I'm wondering if you have people in your life who are able to support you as you help to support your son? The analogy of 'putting your oxygen mask on first' is one that can sometimes be over used, but I'm a huge believer in trying to prioritise self care.  Sometimes it's as simple as making time to have a cup of tea, or going for a walk while I chat to a friend on the phone - but it definitely helps to 'fill my own cup'. 

 

Hope your week is going OK @Mv161705 - hope that some of this is helpful Heart