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School Emergency Contact

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Casual scribe
Shakes
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School Emergency Contact

I have been alienated from my Children by my ex-partner, whom used the system to subjugate me. Child Safety became involved briefly over a minor incident turned exagerated. The outcome stated that the Children were at risk of emotional harm with me, and not with the Mother. I was shocked! Once the Mother was settled in her new place (it's what she wanted), the Department closed the matter. That made the closure letter redundant in enforcable effect so I'm told. Nothing else was recorded, or orders made. The Mother thought she would then have to use that letter to alienate me, and had every intention to do so whilst she hot started coaching the Children what to say.

Since the Mother has no family, or supports, when she enrolled our third born into the School, she removed me as an emergency contact, and placed her freshly known new boyfriend down as emergency contact, calling him her 'partner,' when they don't live together. I mentioned in an email to the School that I was displeased with this disregard for me, and their acceptance or removing me having known what happened, but they said nothing. They don't want to know about 'non-School matters.' They also don't want to know about the Mother's School catchment enrolment fraud, not to have her charged, but to be aware she will do anything to get what she wants. My concern in this post is using a stranger as an emergency contact over me, regardless of if he is known to the School or not, I find not only offensive, and disregarding of my Parenthood, but also potentially unsafe should he have to take our Children home by himself to his place totally seemingly out of my control. I have legal pathways active, taking Child Safety to QCAT, and the Mother to Court eventually, so we'll be running on Interim Orders for a while.

What are my options regarding this boyfriend emergency contact she used? Another emergency contact she used is her elderly Grandmother with no licence, and lives four hours drive away.

Informed opinions appreciated please. Don't care about her, but my Children aren't safe with the Mother imo.

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Super frequent scribe
Maddy-RO
Solution

Re: School Emergency Contact

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Hey @Shakes 

 

Welcome to ReachOut, and thanks for sharing what's going on for you. That sounds like a really tough situation to be in, and I can understand how/why it's getting to you.

 

It's good that you're seeking legal advice, and at this point I can't think of any other options for you, but I thought I'd tag some parents to see if they have any suggestions for you or can relate to you in any way: 

@PeteNorthside @JAKGR8 @sidneysdad @Pammy62 @IppyMum4305 @Rustythedog1 @Dexter1 @PapaBill 

 

Also, just thought I'd let you know that we have some articles on co-parenting that may be useful:

 

Handling communication issues with your ex.

 

How to organise a co-parenting plan.

 

How to stay connected with your kids as a single parent.

 

And some support options here.

 

And we have a single parents discussion board here which may also be of use.

 

Hopefully things improve for you soon!

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Super frequent scribe
Maddy-RO
Solution

Re: School Emergency Contact

Message contains a hyperlink

Hey @Shakes 

 

Welcome to ReachOut, and thanks for sharing what's going on for you. That sounds like a really tough situation to be in, and I can understand how/why it's getting to you.

 

It's good that you're seeking legal advice, and at this point I can't think of any other options for you, but I thought I'd tag some parents to see if they have any suggestions for you or can relate to you in any way: 

@PeteNorthside @JAKGR8 @sidneysdad @Pammy62 @IppyMum4305 @Rustythedog1 @Dexter1 @PapaBill 

 

Also, just thought I'd let you know that we have some articles on co-parenting that may be useful:

 

Handling communication issues with your ex.

 

How to organise a co-parenting plan.

 

How to stay connected with your kids as a single parent.

 

And some support options here.

 

And we have a single parents discussion board here which may also be of use.

 

Hopefully things improve for you soon!

Casual scribe
Shakes

Re: School Emergency Contact

Thank-you, though this is no ordinary attempt at co-parenting. There are negative, even damaging personality traits at play here, and the only language they (not the Mother alone) pursue, and reaond to is legal channels. This may be the Mother'a undoing due to lack of amicable, and approachable hostile intent. I've already had the response email threating authorities for merely talking to her regarding our Children, and attempting to prevent further complications.

I've been through a lot with a previous marriage that had two Children to it. But in 2013, reform swept through access to legal services, and made my task now so much more anxious to bare. I'm taking new found pathways now, but I am not excited about the Mothers willingness to particiate without hostility, and manipulative attempts to keep our Children to furnish her lifestyle. Lucky I have been retaining evidence where possible.

Thanks evryone for their continued feedback ;-)
Super contributor
Taylor-RO

Re: School Emergency Contact

Hi @Shakes, thanks for providing a bit more context on the situation. I am really sorry that you are feeling more anxious about accessing legal services. That definitely can add some weight to an already difficult situation. As you have mentioned, retaining evidence and responding through legal channels may be a way for you to communicate without facing hostility. All of us here really wish you the best and please look after yourself throughout all of this. Please feel welcome to keep us updated Smiley Happy