05-12-2019 01:45 PM - last edited on 05-23-2019 12:49 PM by Jay-RO
Iam in the same situation with my twins.
My ones were fighting too so the girl went to stay with a relative.they are nearly 17 now.The situation is the same.the boy is not going to school the girl has moved out living with a boyfriend. I don't know what to do.Iam trying to homeschooled my son and keep trying to talk to my daughter.Very difficult situation.Look after yourself.Try to talk to them nicely.
05-23-2019 12:57 PM
Hey there @sylvia,
Just letting you know that I moved your post to its own thread so that other users will see it and be able to respond How are things going with your twins?
It sounds like you're in a difficult situation, is there anyone you're close to that you can go to for support? Having a good support network of friends, family or professionals can be a great way of helping you handle difficult situations with your twins.
I am also going to tag in a few other users who have spoken about kids not going to school and moving out before as they may have some advice that they can share with you
05-26-2019 05:19 PM - edited 05-26-2019 05:20 PM
Double trouble sounds horrible. Good on you for sticking with it.
When teens refuse to go to school on an ongoing basis, something serious is likely at play. It isn't just wagging anymore. Teens refuse to go to school because they feel an aversion to school itself. Usually their preference would be to go to school but something there is more troubling or anxiety inducing than not getting an education.
Are you sure is is school refusal and not just wagging?
So - has it been going on for a long time? how anxious/stressed do they get?
There are so many possible reasons for their choices and behaviours. I wonder what they are.
Some teens refuse to go to school because they’re worried about a troubling situation at home. For example, teens might want to stay home if a parent is ill. Moreover, if their parents are fighting, a teen might want to stay close by to prevent one parent from leaving or from hurting the other. Teenagers who have problems with authority and following the rules sometimes refuse to go to school.
It really helps to use compassion, understanding and patience to get to the heart of the problem. If possible, try to involve someone from the school or education department when trying to negotiate school changes. Most high schools have a counsellor or attendance officer who should have access to information and resources for school attendance. After all, it is their job to educate, isn't it? Having said that the school should also be willing to be flexible to some extent as well. They need to break out of the factory style system for these anxious teens.
I haven't offered much help but there are some more ideas in my other answers - just click on my name and they should come up.
Good luck and big hugs. .
05-31-2019 09:19 AM
Hello darlings thanks for your concern .Unfortunately my situation has not improved.My son has video game addiction.. Iam trying homeschooling at the moment he is refusing to do it but I told him he has to move out if he is not doing anything.My daughter still has not come home she is behaving like iam her worst enemy...these games have wrecked our family..that is how all started about a few years ago
06-06-2019 02:55 PM
Hey @sylvia, thank you for the update
I'm sorry to hear that things haven't been going that great. Are there any local schools that might be able to help you with homeschooling your son? A thread you might find interesting is this one on Gaming, where users have shared their experiences with gaming. There might be some strategies other parents have used that might be helpful in dealing with your son's video game addiction, what do you think?
We've also done an Ask a Young Person segment on the forums, where one young person answered a question about why a user's daughter says she hates them that might also be interesting to read.
It can be hard to cope with negative situations without much support from friends or family. If you feel comfortable, you could try reaching out to a professional, such as a counselor or psychologist. There is also a ParentLine that you can call. What do you think?
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