07-29-2022 10:45 PM
How to deal with Disobedient 11 year old stepson
07-30-2022 03:44 PM
07-30-2022 09:43 PM - last edited on 08-01-2022 03:38 PM by Iona_RO
I have an 11 year old extremely hyper, disobedient and ADHD type stepson that, many times, pushes my 70 year old Body, off the wall and elevates by Blood Pressure ! He has in the past played cell phone games 1/2 - 3/4 of the day, then completes his day with the various non-educational violent TV shows. When I advise him that his time is UP, he goes off the wall, with bad Talk back. I have now placed him on a 1 hour of cell and 1 hour of TV a day.......of course making me # 1 villain in his life. His Mother , like most Mothers worships her son like a Golden God and defends his many actions. .
His Mother defends his actions . Other than verbally expressing my opinions and not getting the message thru to his Mother, I have on numerous occasions gone online to find educational and factual parent/stepson recommendations, for disobedient 11 year olds. I print the articles and show them to her. Because my wife needs written Proof that his disobedience is likely caused from him watching too much Cell or TV.
From dirty killer expressions to kicking the couch, slamming doors, computer damaging, stomping off .....he shows his anger and rebellion whenever the does not get what he wants. I can try to re-direct his actions from Cell and TV, to going out on his Bike to meet friends or read a book or anything , other than watching constantly the TV /cell.
It goes on and on.
I have had his Thyroid blood checked for his hyper ways and his hearing checked trying to find out if his issues are health related , mental related.
I understand I am not the only StepFather that has a problem like this, with a stepson, HOWEVER, how can I get his Mother to get onside with me so we can discipline equally to his disobedience ?
Your advice is welcome and appreciated .
07-31-2022 01:10 PM
I’m so sorry that you feel very frustrated by this situation, and your attempts to find resolution through encouraging your stepson to go for a bike ride or read, have been unsuccessful.
Blended families can be hard, and it sounds like you and your wife have different parenting styles and beliefs.
Can I please ask if you have looked at going to family counselling in your local area? This may be a good starting point if you believe your stepson needs some specialized support.
Another starting point could be relationship counselling for you and your wife, so that you can discuss things together with the help of a professional.