How to handle Tween Girls bullying

[Mum_to_tween]

I have a nearly 13 year old, she has a schoolyard boyfriend who goes to another school. She also has a male best friend who is just a platonic friend at her own school. There are a group of girls who keep taking photos of them and pushing them together in photos sending them to the boyfriend trying to cause trouble saying she’s cheating. He knows about her best friend being a boy and has not had any issues but this latest episode of sending him photos is obviously putting doubts in his head and it’s causing her distress because of these girls and trying to spread rumours she’s cheating etc around the whole high school as well.

I’ve tried to say teenage girls can be really mean at times and soon they will go on to find some other poor person to humiliate but right now it’s hurting her. I’ve told her to ignore them, tell them to stop taking photos of her and her friend and because it’s happening in the classroom where they not meant have their devices so speak to a teacher but she doesn’t want to be a “snitch”. Apparently they are popular girls but I’ve said for all the wrong reasons. What else can I advise or do?

[Courtney-RO]

Hi @Mum_to_tween and welcome to our online community!

I'm sorry to hear that your daughter has been bullied at school, no one deserves to go through such an awful experience. I can only imagine how hard it must be for you knowing how much this hurts her. I was just wondering what supports your daughter has around her right now. Has she spoken to anyone else about this at all?

I know you mentioned that she doesn't want to snitch on these girls, but I am wondering if the school might be able to offer some additional supports that might be able to ease the situation a little. Do you think she might be comfortable talking to a school Counsellor, if that is an option at all?

If you are interested in having a bit of a read, there is a great article on the Raising Children's Network about Bullying and what you can do to help. I wonder if this might be able to give you a couple of ideas as to what to do next.

Please remember that you're not alone and we're all here for you.