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New full time stepmum - help!

New full time stepmum - help!

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dmer21

New full time stepmum - help!

Hi,
I have been with my partner exclusively for 3 years (now engaged and have a 7 month old daughter together).
My partner also has two sons from different mothers. ( one 4 year old and one 9 year old - both managed to get pregnant at the same time their relationship was / had ended).
We saw the kids every weekend - the 9 year old gave me hell and made it known he didn't want me around but he managed to grow to like me after 7 months of drama).
Both mothers packed up their lives and left their kids behind so they are now living with us full time.
The boys are consistently rude , the 4 yr old ignores me morning and night and mine and my partners rules / patience is alot different so they can get away with everything.
I'm at the stage where I need to leave but my daughter is keeping me here! Any advice would be greatly appreciated... im unhappy, stuck and at a loss!
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Sophia-RO

Re: New full time stepmum - help!

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Hello @dmer21 , thank you for sharing with us here on the forums. I am sorry to hear about the issues that have been experiencing with your partner and his two sons. It sounds like it has been really difficult for you to experience, particularly if you are considering leaving.  By the sounds of it, you have put a lot of effort in over the last 7 months with his children, which has helped to develop the relationships you have with them. I am sorry to hear that these relationships have been under strain lately as you and your partner have different rules for the children. I can't imagine how difficult it must be to be disagree with your partner on how you would like to parent the children. Is this something that you would feel comfortable discussing with your partner?

 

If you have not already spoken to a professional about this, I would highly recommend speaking to a professional to get some support and advice around what your next steps should be. One helpline that you can call for advice is Parentline. You can call them to talk to a trained counsellor and get some advice around what you can do. I hope that you find this to be helpful Heart