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New member? Introduce yourself here!

New member? Introduce yourself here!

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mazeful

Hi We are in New Zealand - One 7 year old son.

1. How did you find out about Reach out?

google search

 

2. What are you most proud of your kids for?

My son tries at everything... and gives things a go.

 

3. What's your number one way to relax?

horizontal on the sofa blanket on top with Netflix

 

4. Tell us the worst piece of parenting advice you ever received

just let them cry

 

Then the best piece of parenting advice you ever received?

Go down to your childs level and listen to them with out interrupting. Example the reasons behind your actions.

Casual scribe
hands4healing

Re: New member seeking any useful feedback as a parent

HI There, I am a single mum of boy/girl teens, both 14. 

Its tough being on my own sometimes as I feel alot of the time I am just the good/bad cop. 

Generally I have a a great rapport with my teens as a parent and very in tune with them.

But as they have progressed to teenage hood it is sometimes harder to communicate with them. They dont always want to share or I find they become overwhelmed with their own feelings. 

I am going through a tough time at the moment with my daughter who suffers with depression and anxiety. recently we have butt heads more. we recently had an instance where I caught her out on not sharing something with me and wouldn't open up to me about the issue. ( it was really minor in the scheme of things, but it was not the first time I had caught her out in trying to hide something in her bedroom from me. I needed to send her a message, to not fob me off or not feel comfortable in sharing the truth - with hindsight in mind, thinking when it came to more crucial or matters that involved risk, that she would be inclined to hide it from me. I am mindful of the pattern at stake and want to step in and correct it, before such instances occur. I am not naive to think that as teenagers, this will never happen, but I am as a parent, want both my kids to know they can come to me about anything and more so when they are faced with a situation they are really unsure about. I communicate this to them all the time by the way)

Anyway, at first I had said you cant go to a friends meet up, cos I was expecting her to tell me the truth. She then pulled the mental health card on me and I relented, and said you can go, but I restricted and minimised the time. IN part of the blow up, She shared, she didnt trust me. As a parent, I was shattered. I was also concerned, if she couldnt trust me, who could she trust. IN a time of real need, who would she turn to? 

I guess her struggle with mental health is hard to manage and watch. I too have a history of mental illness I manage and often blame myself, that she is mirroring my own behaviour, yet she has been formally diagnosed and we are dealing with it. living in a region where mental health services are stretched to the max, it is a tightrope walk and just want to use another medium in case it cast some help I hadnt been able to get. I appreciate any constructive comments. thank you

 

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supportive1

Hi everyone, am thrilled to be able to join this forum.

Am parent of an 18 y.o. who loves to dance with good music. It gives me joy when I see him dance.

As parenting can be really stressful I try to keep those stress levels down through empathetic conversations, exercising and meditation.

I have been researching a topic on raising children website and notice the ReachOut Parents forum and decided to join.

For parents whose kids are about to enter teenage years, my top tip is to pay attention to their emotional needs and have empathetic conversations so they feel confident in sharing with you their struggles. In this way, you can help them explore solutions, including seeking help, that they can implement and be in control.

For me, the weekends are about catching up with sleep, homework, going out and having lengthy meals together.
Mod
Sophia-RO

Re: Hi everyone, am thrilled to be able to join this forum.

Hello @supportive1 , thanks for sharing some really great tips that you have used to help when you are feeling stressed. I truly agree with your top tip to pay attention to your teens emotional needs and have empathic conversations. Sometimes having a respectful and open relationship where good communication is key can really help to mitigate some difficulties that might be experienced.

 

It sounds like things are going well for you and your child at the moment, which is great to hear. If you ever do feel like you would like to get some support or share your story, please feel free to start your own thread by clicking “Start A Topic” in the top right corner Smiley Happy.

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Marlo_beach

Re: New member? Introduce yourself here!

1. How old are your kids and what is one thing they've done recently that made you laugh?

4, 15

Recently, one of them in a sibling rivalry move did something that sought to gain my approval. It was funny.

 

2. Parenting can be really stressful - how do you try to keep those stress levels down?

Adults - avoid them and their issues.


3. What led you to ReachOut Parents today?

I have other issues


4. Whats your top tip for parents whose kids are about to enter teenage years?

Love them without them knowing it.


5. Whats the best thing about weekends?

Family

Community Manager
Bre-RO

Re: New member? Introduce yourself here!

Message contains a hyperlink

Hi, @Marlo_beach thanks for introducing yourself to the online community. 

 

I appreciated your tip for parents of teenagers. It's a beautifully worded piece of advice, and it resonates with a lot of the experiences shared here. 

 

You mentioned that you joined due to other issues, which I'm sorry to hear. If you think it would be helpful to tell us more about what's going on, you can create your own thread here.

 

Hope to chat with you at some stage! 

 

Take care 

 

 

Scribe
Yas247

Re: New member? Introduce yourself here!

1. How old are your kids and what is one thing they've done recently that made you laugh?
2. Parenting can be really stressful - how do you try to keep those stress levels down?
3. What led you to ReachOut Parents today?
4. Whats your top tip for parents whose kids are about to enter teenage years?
5. Whats the best thing about weekends?

 

Hey Everyone

Parent to teens 13 and 15

Always making time for myself and running outdoors.

Online support search.

As a tutor I know schools are  a stressful time for kids and can carry all sorts of issues friends circles, bullying, learning support, relationships etc.. So parents always keep connected with what is going on in school and be open to communicating about issues they have without reacting straight away. Often the thought of the parents reaction is what drives the child to keep quiet.

Best thing about weekends is enjoying the countryside.

Mod
Eleanor-RO

Re: New member? Introduce yourself here!

Hey Yas247,


Thank you for introducing yourself and sharing your tips for parenting.

I agree that communication is so important. As you’ve mentioned, it's also very important to respond to your children in a way that allows them to feel safe and comfortable to continue sharing any issues or difficulties they may be having.

Thank you again and I hope to hear more from you around the forums!