False allegations of hurting our children

[Emzoh90]

Hi, il try and keep this short. I fell asleep with my son on the sofa, he was 8 weeks premature and only 8 weeks old at the time. The fall caused a fracture in his skull. They immediately removed our daughter from our care. Under further investigation the found a fracture in his leg which they say cannot have been caused by the fall and would require more force. When he was in hospital the doctor said he has a condition called osteopenia meaning he has weaker bones than the average child.
Both our children are now in care and have been since October last year.
We’re going through court now and the final hearing is scheduled for middle of June.
We have a number of different experts who are looking into this. The first one (neurologist) came back with his report last week and he claims the skull fracture isn’t possible to have happened falling from the sofa also, and it’s likely somebody has done this to him.
Me and my partner are so scared of losing the children if the other experts come back with similar findings.
Our son wasn’t left with anybody else for a long enough period of time to be hurt by anybody. It just seems like such a messed up nightmare we are living in right now. We love these kids more than anything in the world and would do anything for them.
Has anybody else been through anything similar?

[Courtney-RO]

Hi @Emzoh90 and welcome to our online community!

Firstly, I just want to say that i'm so sorry to hear that you're going through so much right now. I can only imagine how stressful and confusing this must all be for you. I can hear just how much you care about your children so i'm sure it must be so heartbreaking to have had them taken away from you. Have you had any contact with your children since they were put in care?

With so much going on, I am just wondering if you are receiving any support for yourself during this time? It can be so hard going through such a stressful situation on your own, so if you haven't already, it could be worth looking into additional supports or resources such as a counsellor or psychologist.

I also just want to remind you that you are not alone and we are all here for you.

[Emzoh90]

Thank you for your reply. It really is the worse experience of my life.

Yes, we were seeing them at a contact centre with somebody sitting in the corner taking notes and supervising. As they closed over Christmas we went most of Christmas without seeing them. My son was originally placed with a foster family, however my sister had since been approved and now is his carer which is much better. We now see the children at my mother in laws and my sisters 6 days a week. It is much better than contact centre but obviously still isn’t great. It’s quite upsetting as my daughter is a real daddy’s girl and she gets upset when we leave her. She is 2 and a half.

I have spoken to my gp back in December and I’m currently still on the waiting list to receive counselling. I do feel like I need some kind of mental support. I am still getting up going to work and seeing the children after etc.. it’s hard to get on with but I need to keep going to the kids sake.

It just seems like a really really long nightmare. I just pray that the court make the right decision and let us have the kids back. They’re our lives and it feels so empty without them.

Thanks again for your response. I’ve posted in a few places for some kind of support or just somebody to talk to but haven’t had any replies.

I hope you and your family are all good.

[Portia_RO]

Hi @Emzoh90 

I'm certain that this is not the way you'd hoped to see your kids, but I'm glad to hear that you're still able to spend some time with them at your mother in law's place. I can only imagine how heartbreaking it is to leave them each day. 

With everything that's going on for you, I can definitely understand why it's difficult for you to keep pushing through and do things like going to work. It would be hard to try and focus on anything else when you're fighting for your kids, especially for such a prolonged period. What do you do to look after yourself when you aren't at work or with you kids? 

That's great to hear that you've been in contact with your GP, but I'm sorry that the waiting list is so long for counselling at the moment. In the meantime, if you think it might be useful for you, it might be worth checking out Relationships Australia. They have some great resources for parents who are trying to regain custody of their children and how to cope in the meantime.

Please feel free to keep us updated on how you're going, thinking of you.