09-13-2018 02:00 PM
13th of September, is officially R U OK day.
It's a day dedicated to reminding reminding us all to check in with our family members, children, friends, peers, colleagues, neighbours.. everyone.. and ask three very powerful words - Are You Okay?
But isn't this something we should ask everyday? Yes!
Today is an opportunity for us to step back, and remember how much we all care about each other. Life can get busy, and it can be hard to remember that those around us may be going through a tough time and want an opportunity to talk about it!
It doesn't take an expert to ask the question, all it takes is a human who cares about another human.
By asking the question, and being there to really listen to the answer, whatever it may be, it shows that you really care.
Not sure how to go about asking? - click here for an info graph ReachOut has developed on How to ask a friend if they are ok.
R U OK DAY suggests these 4 easy steps:
Challenge for today:
1. Start thinking about who you can check in with:
Make sure it's genuine, and that you give the person time and space to answer properly - you can always suggest meeting up later to chat more if they'd like.
2. How do you ask your teen R U OK?:
For some ideas from experience, check out last years' R U OK day thread about checking in with your child here
Questions!
- Is there a time you can share in this thread, when you asked someone if they were OK? How did it go?
- Is there a time you can share in this thread, when someone has asked you if you were OK? How did it go?
- How do you plan to check in with your child/teen on R U OK day? How can you carry this through to other days of the year?
09-13-2018 02:02 PM
09-13-2018 02:08 PM
Just tagging some active members this month who might be interested in R U OK everyday!
09-13-2018 08:16 PM
I’m checking on my daughter in the mornings, at lunch, then at night, and asking her where she is on a scale of 1-10.
1-3 = feeling safe
4-6 = starting to feel unsafe
7-10 = feeling unsafe
We have also just decided on a simple way for me let my daughter know when I’m not okay - we decided on an emoji that I can text to her.
I have a lovely friend and we check in on each other regularly, and more so when either of us are going through something tough. We listen to each other and encourage and support each other, and I never feel judged or burdensome which is really special
09-14-2018 09:35 PM
09-17-2018 04:17 PM
How did you go checking in with your daughter @sunflowermom? Did it open up a conversation between the two of you?
I hope you and your husband had some time to reconnect as well. Your marriage is important too but it must be difficult to maintain a healthy balance whilst going through the ups and downs with your daughter. I think you definitely deserve making your relationship part of your self care
09-17-2018 08:44 PM
I agree with you @taokat. Its so important to give to my marriage attention in order to keep my self care going. And you are so right- It is a difficult balance. I didn't even ask him R U Ok this weekend.....It has been another rollercoaster and no one in our home is really OK right now.
I did ask my daughter in the car after school on Friday..... It went like this Me: R U OK?
Her reply: Good. I felt like screaming through my eyeballs. But I did not push it. Just tried to keep things lighter- I will keep looking for opportunities.
09-17-2018 09:05 PM
I can't imagine the frustration, you did well to keep your cool. Do you have anyone you can turn to, have a quick phone call with when this sort of thing happens with her @sunflowermom
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