Dealing with Teenagers Taller and Bigger??

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Casual scribe

Dealing with Teenagers Taller and Bigger??

Hello Everyone,

I am glad I found this forum. My husband and I are dealing with a nightmare. Our 13 year old son and 14 year old daughter are out of control , very angry, violent, and bullying. Since they have hit their growth spurts in the past year they are both much taller and physically bigger then we are. They tower over us and don't listen. 

We are terrified and at our wits end, any advice or similiar situation??

Community Manager

Re: Dealing with Teenagers Taller and Bigger??

Hi @LeeAlana7,

 

Welcome to ReachOut, we are glad you found us! I'm sorry to hear what is happening at home, it sounds like both you and your husband have had to manage some really difficult behaviours over the last year Heart We feel for you and what you are going through right now. You have found a supportive place here and I hope that you will find the support you are looking for in our parents community Heart

 

I can imagine that this is a stressful time for you both. Do you want to tell us a bit more about the behaviours your kids are experiencing at the moment? When you mentioned they have been angry, violent and been bullying, has this been primarily directed towards you and your husband?

 

I can hear how much you are looking for support to know where to go from here, and I want you to know that you are not alone in this experience. We hear from a lot of parents here going through similar things. I am going to tag a few of our active parents who may be able to give you some support from their experiences too @sunflowermom @taokat @Happy @Moggy3kids @Tulip @hippy_mum @Helpful_Mum @Bren-G_ @Monty777

Star contributor

Re: Dealing with Teenagers Taller and Bigger??

Hello @LeeAlana7
I know it's scary when our kids are towering over us. My 15 year old daughter is 5'10 so i get it. When things get heated, I go to my room. I stop engaging because it will get neither of us anywhere. If you can hold your temper it will show you are the one in control emotionally even if they are bigger. It's also a good example to model for them. Can you call a family meeting to see where this might be coming from? I think a little but of teens testing boundaries is normal. But u need a safety plan for u and your hubby if things escalate. Hang in there, your not alone here.
Casual scribe

Re: Dealing with Teenagers Taller and Bigger??

Hi, 

Thank you for letting us know. Our daughter is 6'3 and plays volleyball , works out daily. When she has outbursts we go to our room. At this point, she could hurt both of us. The other night, she was wearing a horribly skimpy dress and my husband asked her to change. She grabbed him and screamed in his face and pushed him to the ground and cursed at us. Even my husband can't control her, he feels terrible being an adult man thrown around by teenage girl. We don't know what to do, but we are on egg shells, she is grabbing us and pushing. We are afraid if she hits.

Community Manager

Re: Dealing with Teenagers Taller and Bigger??

Hi @LeeAlana7,

 

That must have such a big impact on your feelings of safety in your home Heart I can hear that you are feeling a lot of pain right now, this must be such a difficult experience Heart We are here for you whenever you need to chat.

 

Have you been able to speak to anyone about what is happening at home? Do you have a support network you lean on (this could be friends, family or professionals)?

 

@sunflowermom has raised some great ideas here, what are your thoughts? I do agree that your safety is super important, and it sounds like when your children start to become more agitated, you have been able to remove yourself to your bedroom to stay safe. I'm wondering if you would be interested in some services in your area that can support you? We are more than happy to see what is available and send you some links to support.