ah, I ve just realised Ive logged into an Australian website... hey **bleep**, give it a go we are in the uk...
My 14 year old boy doesn't like his school. He goes to an all boys state grammar school, had to sit an 'eleven plus' exam to get offered a place. At the time he was all for it, was his choice, over the local mixed-(good) comprehensive.
He is now in year 9, about to choose and start his GCSE's which he sits at the end of year 11. He has been murmering since last May that he doesn't think he is at the right school. Now its time to knuckle down to GCSE's it has come to ahead.
He has had counselling, lots of chats and cuddles, the thing is, it has taken all this time to come to the bottom of it. So his school is really good, we all really liked it (us as parents still do), the teachers have been fab, our boy seemed to enjoy the first two years.
So it started with murmerings of he thinks he made a mistake choosing an all boys grammar to the local mixed comp. He complains of the long day (its not), complains of the homework (that is less than the local comp), complains of the 'pressure' he feels (transpires he wants to be the best but he can't), then it morphed into 'schooling in a bubble' ie weird there were no girls, worried about meeting girls, all the boys are too clever, then he started saying he wished he had gone to the local comp where all his old friends went. (At the time, he was complaining that they were leaving him out and growing apart - no contact now except for one). So we started looking into him moving to the local comp. Finally, last night, he says that maybe he should just start again at a new school for a fresh start! That might be better than the local comp. Start again where no one is.
The thing is, there is nothing he doesn't dislike his present school, he just feels a bit he doesn't fit. He's feels he's not as happy or as funny as he used to be. He has a nice new bunch of friends but doesn't do much with them. He knows if he leaves he probably wont see them again as they are not local, which makes him sad. Yet he thinks its the school. He doesn't get bullied, he is doing well academically (although he doesn't think he is). We just don't know what to do! Our boy is not your typical boy, he is quiet and shy, gentle, but can be very funny. He procrastinates a lot. Not massively sporty but likes skateboarding and running although has dropped both recently. We have our chats, he seems a lot better than several weeks or months later it rears its head again. He says he thinks more about it when he is at home then when at school.
So just don't know wherever he is down/depressed and it will follow him wherever he goes or even make it worse if he moves, or wherever if he is so unhappy we should move him. But whatever we do it has to be quick because of the timing of him making his GCSE choices....
I wish I could take away all the angst but it is rubbing off on me, can't sleep with worry....
