Trying to manage after my daughter's suicide attempt

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Parent Peer Supporter

Re: Trying to manage after my daughter's suicide attempt

I'm so so sorry to read about your daughter @sunflowermom, my heart breaks for both of you. How is she now? How are you now?

The poor thing, she spoke my daughter's words to me so often after she's lost it at me. As hard as it is for us when they speak to us like that, it's harder hearing them apologise and not really remember what happened or what they said and unable to understand it themselves. 

 

I felt guilty too doing things for myself whilst my daughter was in hospital, but as they kept saying, she is safe and I needed to take the time to heal too. I was reassured that if my daughter did get upset, she was in the right place to be supported, and that she would be absolutely okay. 

 

Thanks for your support @Sister. We've missed you! How are you?

My daughter is having a rough trot lately. We were told the first week home was the worst for relapse, and we seemed to breeze through until the weekend when she hit a wall. She has another appointment tomorrow for another medication review, so we're taking one day at a time at the moment. 

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Contributor

Re: Trying to manage after my daughter's suicide attempt

  Hi @taokat

This time around for us has been ok so far.  She understands the boundaries but still pushes some- which I expected.  She is enjoying being home and I can see the appreciation she has for her bed and her pets and even her sister a little bit.  We have started meditating together at night which see really seems to enjoy and its something we can do together.  So right now she is back to her sweeter self.  But I hear your warning about the first week and I am cautious.

I loved the "check in" idea you and your daughter are doing!  That sounds awesome without having to knock on her door every 5 minutes to ask how she is.  I think we might try that too!

I am sorry to hear your daughter is having a rough few days.  Hopefully the appointment can help her with reviewing her meds.  We had to make some meds adjustments too this last time in the hospital.  It always makes me nervous- the side effects, etc.

Community Manager

Re: Trying to manage after my daughter's suicide attempt

Hi @sunflowermom,

It's was great read that you are able to do meditation with your daughter and that it has been something you have both enjoyed. 

 

How has this week been for you @sunflowermom and @taokat? How are your daughters? Thinking of you both and hope that you were able to do something nice for yourselves over the weekend Heart


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Parent Peer Supporter

Re: Trying to manage after my daughter's suicide attempt

That's wonderful that your daughter is meditating with you @sunflowermom. I love tai chi and have started doing it at home recently. My daughter watches sometimes but hasn't taken up my offer to join in yet. With gentle encouragement and her obvious curiosity, I'm hoping she will give it go one day!

 

The check in method and scale are working really well for us, so I'll be keen to hear how it's working for you guys. It's a good boundary for me too, as it's likely I would be asking her every 5 minutes which would drive her mad!

 

At the appointment we were reminded that her new meds take 4 - 6 weeks to kick in, so it's likely at the moment they aren't doing anything. She's being reviewed again in the first week of August, so we should be seeing some improvement by then. 

 

Thanks @Jess1-RO for your kind thoughts too. My daughter's out with a friend this afternoon which is awesome. Her social time does her a lot of good as she doesn't have too much of it. It's great for me too - a few hours of free time! 

Contributor

Re: Trying to manage after my daughter's suicide attempt

Hi @taokat

This weekend we had a chance to "fix up" our meditation area- lights, statues, comfy space.  I think my daughter enjoyed it but she still got mad at me saying I was hurrying through the project and I was being rude.  I apologized and said that was not my intention I just had lots to do.  Things are very black and white to my daughter- so it gets a little tedious at times. But mostly a good experience.  She loves the new space to share with friends as well. 

 

When we do the medication adjustments I always need to be reminded of the 4-6 weeks.  I get so frustrated that it takes such a long time to find out if they will even help or not.  I wish there was a better way.

 

I love that you had some time to yourself while your daughter had social time.  Now I finally understand how important that truly is for us as parents.  I think back to all the times I used to take it for granted before life got so intense.

Thank you @Jess1-RO for checking in on me.  It was a good weekend sprinkled with challenges in mood swings with my daughter but mostly there were some great moments  too like shopping and pizza!  Hoping all goes well in our family therapy tonight.  Hoping you had a nice weekend too!