Hi @workingdad2 Welcome to ReachOut parents. Thanks so much for posting.
Cannabis use in young people can be a tricky issue to address as so many young people experiment and then stop somewhere in their twenties and have happy, healthy, non-drug dependant lives. But some, unfortunately, end up on a really hard path that can sometimes last years. So it's almost impossible, as a parent, to not feel fear when we watch our teenagers start to use drugs with some regularity.
The fact that you guys are able to have " open and honest discussions" is great and says you're definitely doing something right. One of the things I've found when working with young peple, and with my own, is to try not to guage the impact of the discussion based on whether they change their behaviour immediately. It doesn't mean he's not hearing you. Check out The Other Talk run by the Australian Drug Foundation it has lots of great info and tips on discussing alcohol and drugs with your young people.
Has he explained what he enjoys about his cannabis use. If you're up for it, and if it's too uncomfortable that's fine, you could do the " What's good and not so good about cannabis?" This is where he writes down on one side all the stuff he thinks is good about cannabis ansd the other all the stuff he thinks is not so good. The trick is letting him determine without intervention. So if he says "relaxtion" is a positive, not telling him that it's better to do it other ways. Which is very hard!! The point of the list is to see how it weighs in his life, if it's all good with no not so goods, he's unlikely to give it up. Which is where the ongoing discussion comes in. You can keep referring back to the list. Give him honest feedback when he's open to it. And call your local Headspace to see if they do drug counselling, to be ready if he asks for it.
And don't forget to keep your boundaries up. Is he getting a mixed message by being allowed to smoke at home? Or is he doing it somewhere else? Take some time to write down what you are and are not ok with in terms of his cannabis use. It's good for him to be clear how you feel about it.
Last thing from me, it's really important that your relationship with your son doesn't become all about cannabis and nothing else. I'm sure you already do but, if not, here's a gentle reminder to keep talking to him about other stuff. try not to let this eclipse everything else.
I'm so keen to hear from other parents about this.
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