Hi @doball-96_, welcome to the forum. It can be so hard seeing our kids so shy and introverted around others when we know how different they can be at home. I'm sorry you're going through this and can hear how worried you are about your son. It's great that you've reached out for support.
My daughter lost her first job because she was so shy, and has spent the last two years in her room, but definitely coming out more this last year, so I understand how distressing it can be. I worried about her education, her lack of social interaction and her inability to function effectively around others.
You say that your son's always been shy, and the teenage years are tough one's, so I think there's still time for him to come out of his shell I'm wondering if he feels safe and comfortable at home with family and those he's familiar with, which is why he is more outgoing there? He may be saying he's going he's out with friends because he doesn't want you to worry about him? Does he generally seem to like spending time on his own?
Some recommendations made to me to help build my daughter's confidence have been/still are, really effective. I acknowledge her strengths and things about her that make her great to be around. I tell her how much I like it when we talk and laugh together. I acknowledge her strengths in conversations we have or when she's pushed through her nerves or anxiety. It was also suggested that I talk to her about what she sees are her strengths and build on those. She now has a casual job at a local fast food outlet that employs loads of teens which has helped boost her confidence more.
How would your son feel about volunteering somewhere in your local area? That could be a great place to start and might build him up and help him in applying for paid work.
The links @Danielle-RO has provided give some really awesome info and worth a read! Some of your words around schooling twigged me to the possibility that you're overseas, so being an Australian site our referrals won't be relevant but the content absolutely is. There's another link here on self esteem and teenagers that you might find interesting too. Sorry to bombard you, but the links will be here for you to refer back to at anytime.
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