Hi @Taylor-RO, yes it is difficult and an incredible shame that the adults involved struggle to see the impact they have, despite having the involvement of a variety of professional supports sharing thoughts on how detrimental it is. My child has incredible mental health support as do I, assisting us through this challenging journey, something I would highly recommend to anyone - in particular someone whose expertise is dealing with the breakdown of the family unit and a caring GP.   Our journey has sadly been underway for nearly 10 years and is unfortunately a perfect example of how the inability to work in the child's best interests will negatively affect the child, in our case the stress has resulted in a barrage of health issues and a diminished ability to effectively navigate the mind-field that is the school ground and its associated bullies, resulting in a compounding world of pain for my child.   So my advice to @Whimsymim still strongly stands to work with the adult involved to find a happy place because the reality of not can be terrible for everyone. ... View more

Hi Whimsymim, I hope the situation has improved for you, your partner and your child.   As the parent of a child who is experiencing a similar situation it is heartbreaking to watch.The difference here is that I am watching my ex loose his child as a result of his wife's relationship with my child. My child feels disrespected and unsupported when at dad's house and I see their relationship slipping away. Although he does not wish to be "caught in the middle" he supports his wife fully and dismisses my child's position.   A significant incident happened recently and at drop off when grandpa left he said "remember, there were three people involved in what happened today and two of them were adults". This will remain a very poignant moment for me.   Sometimes we forget that we are teaching these growing humans how to be decent respectful people, especially when they appear capable and confident. The disagreements and resolutions we have will help teach them to resolve matters the same way.   A wise soul once said to me that disagreements will happen with your kids but it is the way that you resolve it that is important - always apologise for losing your temper and help your kids to understand why. We teach our kids that they are responsible for their actions so naturally they expect that we are too.   In our situation the parenting styles are polar opposite - I believe respectful behaviours are paramount and I see the result of that in return - In the other camp, the demand to be respected without displaying those values results in constant conflict. For the child involved it is a living hell, and seems to be heading down the road of minimal contact with dad and never alone with stepmum - an incredibly sad outcome.   I hope one of your boys is brave enough to hold an olive branch and the other insightful enough to take it.   All the best ... View more