Hi, Well, the situation is just “there”. She’s 19 now and lives at home while going college. She doesn’t discuss any of the gender stuff at all, but lives different lives. When she goes to school she wears a binder and goes by a different first name. At home and at work she goes by her given name. I failed to mention that she is also Bipolar 2. That along with the anxiety is just hard to manage in a living situation. She saw a therapist for some time, but she doesn’t want to go anymore. She won’t make an appointment with her psychiatrist because she doesn’t want to call, so she’s not taking her medication. I can only imagine how hard it is for you with an 11 year old that is confused. I think therapy and talking is a good step! Talk a lot, now while they are young. Just about everything and also bring up the gender confusion stuff. A lot of this is normal, but not permanent. They can live a fluid life without hormones and permanent surgery. Sorry if I’m not much help... ... View more

Thank you for posting. We too are dealing with gender issues with our daughter. She is pansexual, which for our family isn't really an issue. I find it lovely that she can love someone based on who they are inside regardless of gender/sex. We found out by accident and she was ashamed and still doesn't want to talk about it even though its been a few years and she has a girl friend.   Our current issue has been gender confusion. She is a senior and has attended an alternative small charter HS. Which is great for her social anxiety. Since attending this school though she has found some friendly people that are trans, fluid etc. She never had gender issues that I could see as a younger child and I wonder if she has been influenced by her school, internet, anime/cosplay etc. She doesn't have many "physical" friends and is constantly on her phone with her internet friends. She has been using a binder and calling herself by a male name at school, which I just found out about and is a bit shocking as she tried to lie about it. I think I'm just venting at this point. She has asked about therapy because she is confused and we are currently trying to find a good therapist with a good fit and "no harm" attitude (surgery/hormones).   My husband says we just need to love and support her and she will figure it out, but I'm having such a hard time and its on my mind constantly. ... View more