Hi @Lexxy    Welcome to RO and thank you for reaching out to us here. I'll tag a few members for you @sylvia @Boyblue @JAKGR8 @sunflowermom @Faob_1 to help with some ideas for you. In the meantime we have lot of articles and discussion threads you can take a look at   ... View more

This sounds like a really frustrating situation Pullinghairout… I'm sure some parents will be able to share their stratagies with you shortly. In the meantime (if you haven't already) it might be worthwhile getting some support with implementing strategies / boundaries / consequences and taking care of yourselves, while you work through this with your son. Have you ever chatted to Parentline before? They offer counselling and support for parents (open 8am to 10pm) and may be able to offer you a tailored approach to managing things? ... View more

Hey @B-FLY we're glad you've found your voice and were able to express what's been going on for you and your daughter. This sounds like such a complex and heartbreaking situation to be in and I guess after reading through everything, I'm just hoping that you all have found some comfort in hearing each other's struggles (knowing you're not alone) & strategies and that you all @Carebear75 @Bigbear are getting some one-to-one support to help top up your tanks when you need it?     ... View more

It sounds like you really are trying everything you can @Hootbayne. I have noticed that when parents put in place a new boundary or plan there seems to be a bit of an escalation of the behaviours to try and test out how far things can be pushed. I hope things settle down soon for you all and in the meantime, how are you looking after yourself? Are there any self-care or support strategies you could put in place for yourself? I can only imagine how exhausted you must be!   ... View more

Thank you so much for sharing this @Faob_1. I think it will be really helpful, enlightening and might bring a send of relief and understanding for anyone going through this type of experience ... View more

This sounds like a really difficult situation to manage @cryingmum18. It sounds like you're trying your very best to support your son, but I'm wondering if perhaps it might be worth seeking some support for yourself, if you haven't already?   That way a psychologist or counsellor can not only support you through this emotionally but could also help to empower you with the knowledge and the skills to try to manage his behaviour.   ... View more

Welcome to Reachout Parents Forum @emmamilla. I'm sorry today was so frustrating. This time of year is so busy and seems to bring the best and worst out of people. It sounds like you managed to get mostly everything done though, which is fantastic. Is tomorrow a busy day for you? ... View more

Hi @Moloko it's fantastic that you've seen such growth and change regarding your daughter and school. This is a hard time I think for any parent with boundaries, particularly with social media and friendships. I think just remember that when other parents talk about how wonderful their teens are, I would say that they may be sharing the highlights rather than the struggles. Try not to get to caught up by this   With regards to boundaries, have you talked about clear consequences for your daughter when she moves outside of them? If not maybe sit down and talk to her about what she thinks the consequences should be? ... View more

Thank you for sharing what's been going on for you and your family @Dad4good. It sounds like there are a lot of things to unpack here that would put a strain on any relationship. I'm sure many of our members will be able to share their experiences and support but in the meantime I just wanted to check what type of supports you have for yourself? For example, friends, family, a counsellor or helpline (i.e. Mensline)? Or are there any self-care strategies that you use that you find helpful?   I would encourage trying to make your self-care and support a key priority and that way you can maybe get some clarity around making a decision that's best for you and your family.     ... View more

Welcome to RO @Freedom and thank you for sharing your story. It sounds like there are a number of things happening for your daughter right now   Is she seeing a counsellor or psychologist regarding her self-esteem and the separation? Perhaps being able to chat to someone a little bit independent of what's going on may be helpful? ... View more

Welcome to RO parents @Plhelp. Please know that you are definitely contributing to the RO community, as it lets others know they're not alone in their experience. We have had quite a few parents who seem to have come up against a similar situation, so hopefully our members will be able to share their experience with you shortly.I really commend your perseverance and sense of hope and I guess I'd just like to encourage your own self-care and making sure you have independent support to help guide you through this experience. Are you currently chatting to anybody and what's been happening?     ... View more

I'm so sorry to read this @Blindsighted_14 but I am glad that you've reached out to our community.  This is such a tricky situation to navigate and as you say it's information about your child that has come with quite a shock to the system, which can make you feel (understandably) a bit rattled, panicky or overwhelmed?   Have you thought at all about getting some extra support for your daughter and your family via individual counselling or even family therapy? It just sounds like this behaviour is quite unlike your daughter, and perhaps to help understand the behaviour and communicate with each other, a therapist or mediator might be helpful? ... View more

Hi @Lena0604 this sounds like a tricky situation to work through with your son, as you only want the best for him but it sounds like school and socialising aren't his thing at the moment. Does he have any particular interests or strengths that you could encourage? For example, he' mentioned "making big money", but does he have a plan or area he wants to focus in?   Perhaps you could try to nurture that and at the same time encourage him to chat to a counsellor or even a vocational counsellor, who could help him work through his next steps school and work wise? (that way you're a bit removed from it and he can get independent advice?   ... View more

Understandably it sounds like you're feeling pretty exhausted, upset and unsupported at the moment @Beno50. Please know you're not alone. Quite a few of our members have experienced similar circumstances, so I'm sure the community will jump in shortly and offer their support and advice.   In the meantime, do you have any mental health supports (counsellor or psychologist) in place for yourself? I'm just thinking perhaps a one-to-one chat may help to alleviate some of the distress and perhaps help to plan what to do next...   If you don't currently have someone, just remember there are helpline services that are accessible 24/7 such as: Lifeline 13 11 14 for crisis support  or Mensline 1300 78 99 78 for general, relationship and family / parenting counselling. ... View more

Welcome to RO community @Beno50 I'm sorry to hear about your daughters difficulties and hospitalisation and I can only imagine how exhausted you must be, especially as you have your own health troubles impacting you right now. I noticed you've created a stand alone post regarding what's been happening, so I'll link everyone to it here so that they can head over and offer you some support.   ... View more

This is a really hard one @sunflowermom @taokat @Schooner and an area I'm really interested in. From what I've looked into the research suggests that modelling a healthy relationship with ourselves (self-love, self-compassion, self-worth, self-acceptance) is one of the most powerful ways to encourage a healthy sense of self-worth in our children. This can be a struggle for many of us though, because its so much easier to shower others with love, compassion, worth and acceptance, and as parents people tend to put themselves at the bottom of the priority list!   I also think teaching people about failure and how you can't actually reach success without it is really important - so emphasising the journey to reach a goal is paved with setbacks, mistakes and "failures" but this how we learn - What's that quote, fall down seven times, get up eight?   The next thing that we're battling against I guess is our culture and media that keep telling us all we're not good enough (mostly to try and sell us some quick fix solution). Unfortunately I'm not sure how we solve this one yet, maybe its having the awareness of that what's happening and then developing our self-worth so we don't get stuck in that trap of feeling "i'm not good enough".     ... View more

I know you may feel exhausted and broken @sunflowermom as this really is a heartbreaking time for you but please don't lose hope. You always show such great support, strength, perseverance and compassion for others and hopefully we can all reciprocate that for you in your time of need     ... View more

My heart goes out to you both @lizard0812 and @Troubled75. It's such a difficult space to be in when you are supporting a child going through such a difficult time. And yes self-care is a must but can often be overlooked when you're caring for others. I've probably said it before but always remember "you can't pour from an empty cup" so even working in really small care strategies (making time to read, have a cup of tea, meditate, go for a walk, journal) can help to recharge you ... View more

Hi @Matandal4012 it's a good point that when children are younger they may be more easily re-directed to off screen activities. How old are your children now? I'm also sorry to hear that you haven't found the content here very helpful, you mention difficulties with managing social media, was there something in particular or more specifically, you were looking for support or help with?     ... View more

It sounds like your daughter has gone through a lot @Momm-o and perhaps she's in that stage that while she's more stable she may still be experiencing some challenging emotions and thoughts that she is trying to work through and doesn't want to alarm you with them? as you may understandably be worried about her and concerned for her safety    Does she see a counsellor or psychologist? Perhaps, it's worth working together with a professional about reuilding your trust, boundaries and what open communication is? Or if you can work on it together so expectations are clear?     ... View more

This sounds like a really difficult and emotional situation @mrsj02. Do you have a counsellor or support person that you can chat to? ... View more

No worries at all @Town625 I just thought this would be a key bit of info for your other thread too   ... View more

I'm sorry to read that you and your daughter are going through such a difficult time @carm0612 and I'm sure some of our members will have gone through something similiar and will be able to offer their advice / support.   I guess this is particularly complex as you have grief and anger mixed with adolescence which is challeging enough on its own. Do you think your daughter would be open to going to chat to a counsellor or psychologist, either as a family or by herself?   ... View more

Hey @Town625 I can see you have another thread here discussing the challenging time you've been going through with your daughter. I wonder if it might be a good idea to add the below to the other thread that way other parents will have a more complete picture for their advice / opinions? As I'm sure others, will have some sage support for you on this one! ... View more

Hi @Town625 thank you for sharing your experience on RO. I'm sure quite a few of our parents will have been through similiar trials with their teens and will be able to offer some support and advice. I'm also so sorry that you and your daughter are in this space at the moment, it must be really difficult to hear your daughter doesn't like herself and is self-medicating with drugs or alcohol. I think it was a great idea to offer the support of the counsellor and while she may not be ready right now, just keep at it and hopefully soon she might be. In the meantime, do you have a counsellor that could help you to support you through this time?   Also thank you for letting us know you're not based in Australia. That's ok, you can still use our forums it just means that some of our resources, information etc may not apply to you as its local. ... View more

Welcome to RO @katelinh and thank you for sharing your experience. It sounds like you may be feeling a little frustrated that your younger sister and parents may not share your concerns? Which is understandable, you seem to only want the best for your sister.   Has your sister ever said that she's worried or concerned about she's perceived at school or that she spends time alone? For example has she said she's experienced bullied or feels lonely or disconnected from her peers?    Also it sounds like you may not be Australian based? So just bear in mind most of our resources are local and may not apply to you directly             ... View more

My heart goes out to you @Andy002 that sounds like a very overwhelming and exhausting situation for yourself and your husband. I guess my first question would be - what type of supports do you have in place for yourself? Do you chat to anybody, like a counsellor or helpline?  And do you have some self-care strageties in place for yourself? I know this may not directly answer your questions regarding help for your daughters but just remember you can't pour from an empty cup and it sounds like you may be in a space where you're feeling quite depleted?   It sounds like you've tried a number of options so perhaps you've already done something similiar but RO does offer Parents Coaching, which may be worth a look at ... View more

Hi @mariajanes thank you for the app suggestion Just a quick note I have deleted the link to the app as we don't really allow external links, particularly to products or services. Feel free to check out our community guidelines here for more info! ... View more

I'm sorry to hear that you're feeling like this @sunflowermom. I think sometimes we can lash out or unleash on the people we love the most because we believe they'll always be for us no matter what. So maybe the fury was more about everything that's going on for her and as you say her illness, rather than you per se? If that makes sense? Either way it would still be really upsetting to hear all of that so make sure you're gentle with yourself today and take some time out for you     ... View more

Hi @Pippa19655 I'm sorry to hear that you're struggling at the moment but I am glad that you've reached out here for support. Just a quick note, I edited out your name from your last post as we try to keep things anonymous on RO. For a bit more info on how to naviagte the forums you can check out our community guidelines here.   With regards to your son, was there something in particular that you're struggling with or would like some help with?   ... View more