I am looking for some advice about how I can help my partner build his daughter's emotional intelligence and resilience. She has a very fixed mindset and if she doesn't think that she's going to be good at something, she won't even try. Also, when she experiences strong negative emotions (feeling overwhelmed, anxious, stressed, worried, etc) she lashes out at us and has what I call 'little meltdowns'.
To give you an example, she is currently in Year 10. She transferred this year from a public school to a private school because she thought that would improve her grades. They have improved marginally. Over the last couple of months the school has been talking about senior pathways. Specifically around what the girls want to do with Year 11 + 12 to help them with choices in Uni or whatever path they choose.
Last night was the information evening at her school. We all attended and after the presentation, the students were given an opportunity to talk to different subject heads about their choices etc. Turns out that she was also sent a Handbook a month or so ago which would have helped us with the evening immensely. She just didn't see it. When we asked her where she wanted to have a look she had her mini melt down. I think she felt so overwhelmed and realised how under-prepared she was (even though we have been trying to talk to her about this for a while) that she couldn't deal with the emotions.
I'm really worried about how she's going to go for the next two years and I want to help her but I also want to stop being her emotional punching bag (along with her father).
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Hi everyone. I hope I have come to the right place. 1. I am a stepmother to a 16 year old girl. 2. To de-stress I drink wine. 3. My step daughter is 16 and had her Year 10 senior pathways night at school last night. We went along and she was so overwhelmed and her anxiety rose to 100% and she ended up lashing out at the people trying to help her - her dad and I. I realised that she lack resilience and emotional intelligence and I want to help her build those in preparation for Year 11 + 12 and the rest of her life. 4. Breathe... 5. Sleep.
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