Hi @ManleyDanley and welcome to the ReachOut Parents forum!
I hope you don't mind but I've moved your post to it's own thread, so that it can be responded to by our community and given adequate attention!
What you've shared is very clearly coming from a place of true concern, love and care for your partner and her kids. Thank you for sharing and being honest about the situation.
Two things I need to point out - firstly, we are an Australian based service, so our knowledge is of Australian services and practices. We may be limited in the practical help we can refer you to within the US (if that is where you are from?). However, we can still provide peer support from our compassionate and wise community of parents here on the forum. Secondly, we work with and support parents of teens (aged 12 and up), and there are often different things going for adolescents than for kids.
The son that you are asking about is 7 is that right?
Having said all of that - I want to encourage you that you are doing all the right things! You are communicating to your partners about the concerns, and are also communicating to the son that you love and care for him.
I am not by any means an expert in child psychology, but it sounds like something could be going on for the young boy. Acting younger than he is, could be a way of dealing with his changing family and any insecurity he may have around this. Perhaps you could speak to a professional about this with your partner, for tips on how to foster healthy behaviour from the 7yo, as well as healthy relationships in the family. Either a counsellor, psychologist, or online/ phone based service.
There are some online, or over the phone parent services you should be able to access for free in the US - http://www.nationalparenthelpline.org/ - this is one I found, but you may be able to find a more suitable one.
Hope that's helpful, let us know how things are going
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