Hi so sorry I only respond now as I have been so occupied with the festive season and obviously tried spending all my free time with my Grand daughter - Thank you so much for your support and advice and I am so happy to let you know the new year has started off which seems like a much more positive note. We have seeked professional help and are in the process of arranging therapy sessions to help her when she feels unloved and rejected. We are not in Australia - we are in South Africa - we will use all the advice and stay on our knees🙏 I will keep you posted.
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Hi there apologies for the late reply due toFestive time and wanting to spend as much quality time as family together. Your support and advice meant so much thank you! Yes I do agree to the Drs recommendation to go to a good Boarding School facility and they are all in agreement that the Mother is fully responsible for the financial responsibilities going with such a decision as she is employed and have the means of doing so. I have over the holidays discussed the possibility of going to a boarding school with my grand daughter not saying it will be a definite as we are still awaiting acceptance - at first she was very much against this as she again felt no one loves her and is trying to send her away - but after explaining all the benefits of a fresh start not being exposed to all the emotional abuse and new friends etc she has showed that she is willing to go there but made it clear she would prefer not to have contact with her Mother again. the Mother is in agreement with this recommendation as she feels her daughter and parental responsibilities is now off her shoulders and she is free to have her social life back. i have been kept in the loop of all the above and issues mentioned previously by the foster mom with whom I have a very good relationship. I am not able to take my Granddaughter in full time due to work commitments and of course our age. social workers are involved and they further recommended therapy for my Granddaughter to help her dealing with the anger and rejection. should she be accepted at this very good school she will be spending time off and school holidays between myself and the foster mother. One thing we noticed over the holidays is that there are still a lot of anger and rejection that she needs to deal with. She still feels unloved but knows and thanks us all the time for being there for her and loving her. to sum it up it does look like the new year will bring about positive changes and hopefully she will undergo the necessary counseling/therapy.
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Hi I have tried to find a support group on line I have a 13 year old grand daughter who is spending the Christmas Holidays with me I am a young at heart 67 year old gran My grand daughter comes from a very traumatic past - my son died when she was 4 and her mom is bio polar diagnosed very unstable and has emotionally abused her child for the past 9 years. My grand daughter has just been with a panel of medical doctors to try and figure out why she is trying to take her own life and self harming but all agreed there is nothing mentally wrong apart from the emotional abuse and trauma of her fathers suicide. They have also recommended our grand daughter goes to foster care or attends Boarding School as there is no relationship between mother and daughter. My daughter in law does not communicate with us but sends her to us often for week ends and holidays. She has told my grand daughter she doesn't want her. Apart from the odd teenage tantrum she behaves very well when with us. Over the past 2 years my grand daughter has tried to attempt taking her own life and she is often left on her own at home and to top it all her mom drinks a lot. She has been with us now for a week and behaved well till yesterday when I disciplined her for not flushing a toilet and went into a rage! Screamed she is all alone does not have a family and no one loves her? Wrote a suicide note and self harmed in a very suttle way - think she must have googled it at some stage when alone at her moms home - then I left her and later she came and begged me to forgive her as she is always doing the wrong things and asked me not to tell anyone about it- I hugged her and re affirmed our love for her and said on 1 condition it never ever happens again to which she agreed. What do I do now going forward?
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