Danissa that really sucks for the boys. I can relate 100% I think it's important that you don't speak poorly first of all in front of the boys about how crappy their dad is They will definitely figure it out and then they will think you're so strong and classy I would definitely move to maybe passing messages of love to the kids on behalf of their dad. "Dad hasn't had a chance to speak to you himself but he send his love". He can record a goodnight video or I love you video so they can watch it but Allowing him to speak to them first hand constantly get their hopes up is no good. Take down dated records of his conversations and kids responses. And legal aid can be contacted if necessary. Journals are always useful in the legal side of stuff. As for the boys in particular because they are who actually matter most. Build up positivity in them Ask gp or school or kindy for a counsellor they're free. Definitely let the boys know that their dad might like to see them but unfortunately he maybe just can't. And you can spend time with them and do the things there dad isn't able to. Always play down any plans he tells the kids . They should not be aware of plans if he turns up then it's a nice surprise. ... View more