My partner has three children with his ex wife. I have observed concerning enmeshement attachments with their mum. She does not encourage a relationship with their dad and they often tell us or we receive communication from her directly attempting to tell us how to parent in our own home. The eldest is 18 now and mum has made him the man of the house. The results are every time we attempt to set a healthy boundary with the kids they refuse to spend time with us and this is supported by there mum, who regularly shows up at our House when she likes to remove them from our care. I am aware these kind of attachment concerns warrant intensive intervention but how can we do that if we can’t even see the children ? And we need advice on how best to approach this. All three of the children have mental health issues and Mum has medicated them with anti anxieties without their dads consent and we have no details of treating doctors, there has been minimal child protection involvement who referred mum and kids to family functional therapy which she refused to engage with so they closer the case. Any advice or guidance would be appreciated:)
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