Hi Nickynoo, Thanks for taking the time to reply. It sounds like a tough situation and that you are doing a really great job. I'm sure he feels very loved by you. Do you find it hard when the positives might be very brief but issues may last hours? I'm waiting here at home for him to come home and wondering if he actually will or not. My husband says he has to hit rock bottom now. We have honestly tried so hard with him and his behaviour every single day. Parenting him has been exhausting relentless effort with little back. He is now picking friends who are a bad influence and it scares me. Good luck
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Hi Kathleen_RO Thank you so much for your reply. Sorry I didn't reply sooner. Its really nice to know someone out there is listening and willing to help. I will have a look at your resources. Hopefully there is some pearls if wisdom in there that will help in our situation. I really do feel like this is the beginning of him going "off the rails" and it breaks my heart. I know and get along well with the parents of 2 of his friends, but the others in the group, the parents seem to be very absent and uninvolved. He has refused to come home again tonight when I went to give him a lift home. He hid in the house. I understand he's growing and changing but I never thought it would be like this and I worry to so very very much that he is going to make a terrible mistake that will effect the rest of his life. I'm trying to have self care time and also trying to not let this effect our other children who are so lovely and kind. It upsets them to see him doing this aswell. I really do hope that he gets back on track once school goes back. If he keeps on this track, he'll be expelled.
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We need some advice. Our 15 yo son has ADD and ODD. He has recently started medication (only 5 days ago). We are in isolation for COVID. He got it first, and then it went though the family. This also means that he got out of iso first.
Tonight he is at a party and wants to sleepover. It is at a friends big brothers house (who is approx 30yo). We've never met him and have told our son he isn't allowed to stay over and that he'll be picked up by his friends mother when 2 of his friends are being picked up. He has flat out refused and said that he is staying over whether we like it or not. He did ask if he could stay over but refuses to accept our answer. I can't leave iso to go and get him, I'm quite sure he'd hide or run anyway. I've told him there will be a consequence if he doesn't come home as asked. But what?? In the past we've locked away the playstation, this no longer has any impact, we've taken his door off the hinges, also no longer has an impact and only impacts out younger son who's sleep is impacted by the extra noise ( so last time our younger son slept in our room for a few days). The impact his behaviour has on our family is exhausting, negative and very difficult to tolerate.
What is a good consequence to a 15yo not coming home at night? I feel like he just wants to get away with anything and everything. I'm hoping he comes home and this is all unnecessary.
This COVID iso meant we had to cancel a holiday. Luckily we were able to rebook it later in the year. My husband and I are already stressing that he'll simply refuse to come. And what do we do then? Not go ourselves?? Leave a difficult teenager alone in our house for a week??
In a nutshell--> I need help with how to provide consequences to a teen with ODD.
A tired Mum
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