Thank you for sharing what has worked for you. I too am in a similar situation with a 15 yo step-son who is miserable, has little to no personality, cannot make friends at school, does not participate in the family,  yet in coddled and enabled by both my husband and his mother. I honestly dread our time together. Yet, I too decided that a divorce was not the solution I wanted. Having been divorced once already. I know it is painful for the children, and my current husband and I have a child together that I would suffer greatly if we divorced.  I began to think that I could suffer through this situation another few years if it meant my youngest has a better chance of living in an intact home. Plus, at me age, any new relationship is likely to have step kids involved. I don't want to start over just to have to deal with similar problems... I'm already here. It helps me to think of ur time together as a "visit", and put myself out there the way I might for any friend that was visiting my husband. I make dinner, I clean, I try to shut up and be tolerant and polite.  My stepson has lied about me and my other children repeatedly, so I am cautious not to get to close, or be alone with him for any extended period of time. Other than that, I just think that in a few years my stepson will be moved out, and I would hate to have blown up my home and marriage, for someone so insignificant that will be less of a nuisance in just years to come.   Best of luck. ... View more