Hi @missymoo13 , welcome to the ReachOut community! It takes strength to reach out for support, and your willingness to connect here shows just how resilient you are as a parent. It's clear that you care deeply about your children and their well-being.  I’m really sorry to hear about the challenges you and your family have faced and are currently facing. Dealing with family violence and the subsequent impacts on your children sounds incredibly painful and overwhelming, and I wanted to acknowledge your courage in facing such difficult circumstances. It's understandable to feel let down by systems that were meant to protect your family. Your commitment to self-care amidst these circumstances is admirable. Taking care of yourself, no matter how small the gesture, is crucial during tough times. Your tip for parents navigating the teenage years is insightful and reflective of your understanding of the importance of giving teens the space to grow and discover themselves. It can be really important to strike that balance between offering support and granting independence.  I encourage you to create your own thread here to share more about your journey and to connect with other parents who may be going through similar challenges. And I wish you all the luck in finding connection and support within the ReachOut community ... View more

Hi @LeeBelle ,   Thank you for responding. I'm glad to hear you were able to speak to the psychologist and the wait will be about a week. What a relief that you didn't have to wait months for support.    I'm sorry to hear how tired and run down you are feeling at the moment. With the constant worry, it is understandable that you feel like you don't have energy and are worn out. It must be so hard that your husband doesn't see the need for other supports including professional supports. I read that you find it hard to speak to him about these things because he just doesn't get it. I recognise that his family don't really have an understanding either, and that can leave you so isolated.   On the flip side, it's good to hear you had a few hours of reprieve when the kids came over. It must have felt so liberating to be able to laugh and have fun with them. How old are they? I read that the eldest has noticed something isn't right with their once much loved aunt. Have you ever considered what you could say to them?    I hope you are able to get the support you need. That is, put on your own oxygen mask before saving others.    By connecting with others on the forums, I hope you will feel less isolated in this part of your journey. Remember, you are not alone.   We look forward to hearing from you. ... View more

Hi @katcantcope1_  That's really great to hear you've made an appointment to get some support. It can be a bit of a daunting thing to do initially, but well done for making this step. Have you made an appointment to get support from your GP or a therapist, or another support service?   Guilt can be a really difficult emotion to cope with, have you been able to chat to any family or friends about how you're feeling? Sometimes it can help to share the load with others and not feel as if you have to sit with everything you're feeling on your own.    Not having a good sleep can really affect us too. I'm wondering if there's anything you've tried in the past that has helped you get a better sleep at all? If you find your sleep doesn't improve, it'd also be a good thing to chat to your GP about so they can support you further. ... View more

Hi @DolphinLover80, You're most welcome, we're here to support you. We're sorry to hear that your daughter had a difficult day at school. It's great that she was able to talk to her guidance counsellor, even though she was having self harm urges. Does she have any tools for managing these urges when they pop up? We've included a lot of different articles already but there is another one here which discusses self harm and includes tips for managing urges. This might be a helpful article to read in case your daughter takes some time to open up during counselling  ... View more

Hey @Mama_Bear05  I just wanted to jump in and check in and see how you are going? It sounds like you have been doing such a terrific job of supporting your son and have been trying really hard to help him as best you can. In saying that, I can hear how challenging this has been for you and I’m mindful of the impact this might be having on you too. There are avenues of support available for you if think it might help you to support both your son and yourself. If you would like some additional support, we have a free one-on-one coaching service for parents and carers that you may find helpful. Remember that we are all here for you. ... View more

Hi @Callebaut32 and welcome to the Parents Forum! We hope that you are able to connect with other parents and find the support and resources that you are looking for  It's nice to hear that you are helping your toddler to understand consent and to respect the boundaries of others. Offering a high-five seems like a good alternative to a hug, and I can see how some kids would feel more comfortable with this. I'm just wondering if some of the other kids don't know what a high-five is as yet, maybe they just haven't learnt it and don't know how to respond. Do you think your toddler would be comfortable offering a toy to another child and inviting them to play together? This may give him the social contact that he is seeking, as well as practicing sharing skills. ... View more

Hi @jayson1, Thank you for being such a supportive part of the Community  We just wanted to let you know that we had to make a small edit to your post to keep it within our Community Guidelines    ... View more

Hi @Lee23, and welcome to the Parents Forum! We hope that you are able to connect with others and receive the support and resources that you need, as we understand that being a parent comes with a lot of challenges. I'm so sorry to hear about the situation that you are in with your daughter, and how you are hitting a lot of brick walls with communication. Thank you for reaching out to others in the community and offering your compassion and empathy. Can I please ask how you are taking care of yourself right now? Do you have a close friend or family member you can talk to, or access to counselling? We would like to ensure that you are ok, and if you do need to speak with someone, Parenting Line are a very good place to start, more information can be found here. ... View more

Well we’ll see what happens…stepdaughter just informed everyone that she is dropping out of college and going on a year long backpacking trip…my husband and I pay for college and she expects us to finance part of the trip now as well, because she says she needs a break and we should still support her…her Mother and Stepfather are backing her up and saying we have to contribute to her “experience” while she decides what she wants to do about her education… The mean part of me is happy that she will be gone for a year, but so frustrated that we weren’t even consulted about the entire thing and are now expected to finance it as though it were school. We can say no, but we know that will ultimately lead to her “cutting us out” for “not caring”…the usual. I won’t lie, I’m looking forward to the break from the constant upheaval from her issues over coming to our house…but I’m really angry that we have to dole out money to pay for her to swan off school and muck about. It’s expected that the status quo will be resumed when she returns…she’s not even leaving until the summer so we haven’t got a clear answer on why she’s dropping out of college now and not finishing the year. It’s just…absurd. Everything. The whole kit…she can’t handle seeing someone who hurt her feelings 8 years ago, but she’s going to go off backpacking, staying in hostels with strangers, dealing with the realities of nomad living, for AN ENTIRE YEAR?? She’ll be 20 by the time she returns, if she even manages to last a full year traveling…I’m not sure that she really realizes how long that is or how unstable the lifestyle is…I guess that’s the point of doing these types of things, but what will she do if she’s halfway across the world and someone hurts her feelings? How will she cope? You can’t cut out a traveling companion because you don’t like something they said… I’m less upset about the financial part and more upset that it wasn’t discussed with us at all, and we are not allowed to give an opinion that is not positive. Her mother texted my husband and said that if he doesn’t be supportive, she won’t keep in contact while she travels…unbelievable that the emotional blackmail continues even through this, when she won’t even be in the same part of the world! It’s so unnecessary. I keep hoping that things will get better and they just keep getting more ridiculous. I’m trying to hope that she will mature and learn some coping mechanisms while she is away…but I don’t know how I’m going to spend the next 6 months acting supportive and continuing to give in to the nonsense over being at our house when she’s supposed to be grown-up enough to do a trip like this? All I can do is shake my head at this point… ... View more

Hi @yames and welcome to the Parents Forum! We hope that you find the support and resources that you are looking for  You have raised an excellent question about an important issue, and one that would be of concern to parents. This article - How to Talk about Drugs with your Teenager - is a really good starting point, with additional info being available here. ... View more

Hi @Adelaide314, Thank you for the update, we understand that it's the child's mum that is the primary person involved in the health care decisions. We have sent you an email, if you could please keep an eye out for that. ... View more

Hi @KR5555 and thanks for the update. Your daughter does sound very committed to maintaining her exercise routine, and I understand your concern for her. Consulting with a GP would be a good starting point to see if accessing a mental health care plan could be a potential option for her. Given that you're out of the city, are you able to access your GP via telehealth? Let us come back to you about possible alternative ways for you to be able to access the one-on-one parent coaching service, in the interim, if you would like to access some free over the phone counselling support, Parentline are a really good resource. ... View more

Hi @Ninja234 and Welcome to our Online Community! Firstly, I just want to say thank you for dropping in and supporting other community members. It can be really helpful to hear from someone else in a similar situation and really appreciate you sharing part of your journey with us. Reading through your post, I can hear just how much you care for your friends and their child. It sounds like they are incredibly lucky to have someone like you who not only cares enough to learn about the current climate, but who also educates and shares their knowledge too. That is so lovely to see! We look forward to hearing more ... View more

Hi @SamsonAdams, Thanks for reaching out and offering support to others in the Community. Just a friendly reminder to please ensure you are following the Community Guidelines as outlined here when doing so, as parts of your post have needed to be removed to better align with the guidelines. ... View more

Hi @SamsonAdams, Thanks for reaching out and offering support to @Mimi80 Just a friendly reminder to please ensure you are following the Community Guidelines as outlined here when offering support to others in the community  ... View more

Hi @proudmommyof2, I can understand how challenging this would be for you, and I'm incredibly sorry that your pursuit of education didn't work out as you had planned. It's wonderful to see your love and dedication to your kids, and hopefully by being part of the forums you'll be able to find some support and connection with other parents. Given that you don't have any family that can be there for you, do you have a friend that you trust enough to confide in about how you are feeling right now? Or are there any options for mothers support groups in your local area? How are you taking care of yourself at moment? Is there something nice you can do for yourself over the weekend? ... View more

Hi @Freddy74 and welcome to the Parents Forum! We hope that you are able to find the support and resources that you need from the community  I'm very sorry that your daughter is feeling so lonely, I can understand how that would cause you to worry, and it's wonderful that you're reaching out to other parents to gather information about potential supports for her. As we are an Australian-based service, I'll pop in some links for you so you can refer to some resources in your local area. You could start here which outlines resources available in the UK, as well as here. If you're up for a bit of a read, here is an article about helping teens to make friends, and helping your teen to feel more confident.  ... View more

Hi @BlondieAlert24 , Welcome to the Parents Forum, we hope that you are able to find the help and support that you are looking for from the community  Thank you for sharing, and I'm incredibly sorry that your daughter's dad has chosen not to participate in a relationship with her. I can understand that this situation would be starting to weigh quite heavily on you as children can be very inquisitive! What sort of supports do you have available at the moment? Would consulting with a child psychologist be a potential option for you? ... View more

Hello @Sadmumof3, and welcome to the Parent's Forum. I'm so very sorry that you, and your son, are struggling at the moment. The loss of a relationship can feel very painful and overwhelming, and it isn't easy to process at any age. It's understandable that he would be very upset right now, and that you seeing him this way, would also cause you distress. As a starting point, here are some articles about helping a young person through a break-up, helping them cope with change, and opening up communication. Does your son have any support through his friends, or is there counselling services available through his university that he might be able to take advantage of? During this difficult time, please also remember to take care of yourself. Do you have anyone that you trust enough to be able to open up to? ... View more

Hi @Clara91, Thanks for reaching out to @Milliejosh2 to show some support   The Parents Forum is a safe, supportive, and non-judgemental place for parents to chat, and I wanted to welcome you both to the community!    ... View more

I absolutely understand. This is something I hear on a daily basis from my stepdaughter. Knowing that I am not alone and that others are dealing with similar challenges as I am has greatly aided me. You are not alone. Reading your story made me realize that I could have written the same thing about my daily life. Best wishes  ... View more

Hi @rockyroad78 and welcome to the Parents Forum, we hope that you are able to find the support you need by connecting with other parents. I'm very sorry that you have been experiencing such stressful events over the past year. You are showing enormous strength given that your son has gone through chemo, that must have been incredibly difficult for you. I can understand that you are dealing with a lot of challenges given that you are in a blended family situation. Do you have any professional supports in place at the moment? Or do you have any family or close friends that you are able to confide in?  I've also sent you an email, so please keep an eye out for that. Please take care of yourself. ... View more

Hi @teacher333 and welcome to the Parents Forum. I can understand that you're wanting to help support your son while he is going through such a difficult time, and also how this must be quite stressful for you as well. This clip: What if my teen doesn't want help with their mental health? and the article: What to do if my teenager refuses help with depression might be good starting points, and although it says "teen" in the title, it is geared towards supporting young people in general. As we are an Australia-based service, I wanted to pass along the contact info for kooth, who are a free and anonymous mental health service based in the US, as well as the National Alliance on Mental Illness (NAMI) which provides support and resources to individuals and family members.      ... View more

Hi @padgie, I can understand the pressure you may be experiencing in this situation, and I'm sorry that you're having to deal with this, especially since you are pregnant. I hope this isn't causing you too much stress, and want to remind you to take some time to take care of yourself Blended families can be difficult to navigate, and if you'd like to look at counselling and support services, Relationships Australia is a really good resource.  Also, welcome to the Reach Out Parents Forum, we hope that you're able to connect and find support with other parents  ... View more

Hi @Me-me and welcome to the Parents Forum  I'm incredibly sorry that you are going through this situation, it must be very upsetting and very stressful for you. Can I please ask what sort of supports you have in place for yourself right now, such as family, friends, or professional services? If you do need to talk to someone, Parentline is a very good resource, and offer support 24/7.  In case you're not already familiar with them, the Dept for Education, Children, and Young People can also provide advice and referrals to services that may be able to help support you.  As a side note, just letting you know that a part of your posts needed to be edited to better align with our community guidelines.  This is a very difficult situation, so please remember to take care of yourself and reach out if you need some support. ... View more

Hi @Youwish thank you for getting back to us and sharing more about what has been going on for you. I’m so sorry to hear that you have been experiencing this, it sounds like it has been a very difficult and challenging time for you all. I can tell how much you care about both your daughter and your partner and can only imagine how hard it must be that your daughter doesn't want anything to do with them. It sounds like a lot to be going through right now, especially without the support of your family. Do you mind me asking what your relationship was like with your daughter before your partner? You mentioned that you had spoken to professionals who gave you ideas on how to approach the situation but that they only worked for some time. I am wondering if something happened that might have caused this shift in behaviour? I am mindful of the impact this must be having on you, so I am just wondering if there is someone that you might feel comfortable talking to about this? If you would like to talk to someone, Relationships Australia is a great support service that might be able to help you work out your next steps. I thought it might also be worth mentioning that ReachOut offers free one-on-one support with an experienced professional for parents looking to navigate parenting. You can find more information on this service here if this is something you might be interested in.  The Raising Children's Network also has a number of great articles on co-parenting, talking about tough topics with children and even a list of support services. Do you think these might be helpful at all? I also just wanted to remind you that you are doing such a great job, despite all these troubles. We are all here for you. ... View more