I hear you! My 12 year old is also self harming. Just  a few days shy of her birthday, I am considering cancelling everything. Not as punishment but because I was planning a sleep over with one girl and not sure if that is fair to the other child. I, too, am so angry and confused. I dragged myself out of bed to make a cake, arranged this crazy surprise celebration, running around and yet, she cuts herself. I know it cannot be helped and she did not readily tell us, but I'm still angry, What did I do wrong? My husband/stepfather wonders if he has done something wrong? I'm definitely knocked down; but not knocked out. Tomorrow, I cancelled all of my work, will pull her from school, and take her wherever she needs to go. Is this the right response? Should I cancel the sleep over? ... View more