Do I allow my 17 year old to go out this weekend?

[lunetika]

I need help with deciding whether or not to allow my 17 year old son to go out this Saturday night, as he has too much work to get done. He is truly a wonderful teenager and up to now we have had an incredible relationship. He is in the process of college applications and has very high expectations yet, he is behind on the work he needs to do before the due date. His schedule is very intense with a variety of activities and a very challenging school schedule. So, he insists that he needs a mental break in order to be efficient the rest of the time he is working. Do I allow him to go out to an event he has planned for months, and let him reap the consequences of not having his work done? Or do I turn this into a lesson of no work no play. Please help, I don’t want to shut him down and I do understand one needs to clear ones mind. Yet I fear this will be his MO for even more crucial things in his life.

[Jess1-RO]

Hi @lunetika and welcome to the ReachOut Parents Community! We are glad you found us and made your first post. 

It sounds like your teen is coming to the pointy end of his high school studies, and you are both looking towards the future. I can imagine this is a really stressful time for you both, between school schedules wrapping up and college applications, it sounds like you both have a very full schedule.

Supporting teens to make decisions (and sometimes wear the consequences of those decisions) is tough  and is something we hear from parents quite often in the forums community. 

The event that he is hoping to go to and has been planning, what does it involve? Is it someone that is only 1 night, and are there perimeters you have both set together around the work expectation should he attend? 

I would be interested to explore this a bit more with you

Just letting you know I moved your message to it's own topic so that more parents will find your post and hopefully get a few more perspectives