School refusal

[Exhausted16]

I am dealing with a 16 yr old daughter and school refusal.
She isn’t one that has ever loved being at school, but attended primary school and did well.
High school started and everything went down hill, I don’t think it helped that we had our first lockdown that year.
The school has been amazing but can only really help the days I can get her to school.
She has been seeing a psychologist for a couple of years now and things have improved. We have days where there are no issues and she goes to school without fuss.
We have days that start out well but she refuses to get out of the car once we get to school.
And days when I walk her in and hand her over to a teacher.
This is her fifth year at high school and I am exhausted and frustrated and fed up.
Any insight would be welcomed.

[Astra-RO]

Hey @Exhausted16, welcome to the online community and thank you for reaching out for support with you and your daughter's struggle with school refusal.

I can really hear that you've tried so many things to help your daughter, from seeking professional support to communicating with the school. It sounds like you and your daughter have made some progress and things have improved to the point where some days she can go to school without struggle. This is really good to hear. It makes sense that the transition into high school would have been made so much more disruptive because of the lockdown. Sadly, the lockdowns did seem to increase or worsen many families experiences of school refusal. 

Your feelings of frustration and exhaustion are so understandable and I can hear that you're at a loss with what to do next and how to best support your daughter. 

I wonder if you've spoken with your daughter about what's behind her avoidance of school and how she is feeling about it? I was also wondering if you have been able to access any support for yourself during this stressful time?

We do have a lot of resources around school refusal which you can check out here as well as a discussion post about school refusal here

I hope you find these resources helpful and the community a safe and supportive place