14 year old boy has run off the rails - needing suppport

[Designed]

Lol great dane any better than a human man's snores? Thanks for your reply. Glad things have settled down, but be aware of outbursts. Anyway, have since edited my long post, as realised anyone not signed up could still read it...so glad you saw it first. You could get your house craned into the middle of the outback? No. Okay. It is horrible having your child take off to who knows where. And I don't think we have had drugs on the scene. So am feeling for you. Has your son had any diagnoses? Yes please let me know. Just spent another evening researching adventure therapy/live in places. There's a school in Tassie I came across called Capstone College for kids like ours grades 9 & 10 only, 16 kids in each class. Problem is it isn't live in. And like you, our son was sweet as pie to everyone else (inc Police)...except his own family. He would push everything down until he got to his "safe place"...then the volcano would erupt. I think ppl used to think we were making it up! These days he is okay to strangers, indifferent to school & friends, rude to people he has struck off, and off the show to us...though better since we have walls and glass in between. It's now like someone has turned off the gas to his flame. But he did get very cruel & cold hearted in the end. If you find anything that helps/services, please let me know. Like you, I understand it takes the community & every bit of resource to fully help our son & family. Enjoy your 9 days to the fullest!

[Orbit64]

On occasion our Great Dane is louder than my wife and possibly me. (Quiet chuckle)

[Designed]

So says you...ask your wife 😆

[Orbit64]

We recently lost our very gentle and beautiful 90 kg male Great Dane. 1 m at the shoulder. He beat us all. He was up there for world championship snoring.

[Designed]

That's very sad...especially in an already grieving environment I saw on your other posts how protective he was... or do you have another?

[Orbit64]

We lost our big male at Easter. The other smaller female is the one we still have. She is starting to show protective behaviour.

[Designed]

Ahhh. She must miss the male too :/

[taokat]

Hey @Orbit64, I'm hoping that your family is making the most of respite while your son is away at camp.  I'm really hoping that once he returns you and your wife can continue on with the tools you are learning with the coach and with the things you had been using that you said had been working.

It's a very difficult situation that your son is feeling too. I don't believe 2 weeks away is going to return to you a son who will no longer have any struggles. I think it's an awesome start and opportunity for him, but these issues often require a whole family re-balance. And he is a teenager, an age where the brain is going through so many changes, most times they can't even explain why or what is happening. 

Can I please suggest looking into other longer term options if you are not wanting your son back in the house if he misbehaves when you pick him up? I understand that we get frustrated and we say things, but I do hope dumping him in the bush isn't really an option you are considering.

I hope that you can speak to the coach, a psychologist, or welfare officer and come up with options that give safety to all concerned. 

[Designed]

"Like" your last comment @Orbit64 from last night that is no longer on here.

[Orbit64]

No I would not dump him in the bush. 

It would be in a camping ground or caravan park far enough from home that it would make him think twice. 

I hope that that will not be the case. I am quietly optimistic that his Wilderness Therapy program has helped him turn a corner in his attitude and responses to situations. 

I full recognise this will not be problem solved. We just want to turn a corner. 

Something like the Paul Keating J curve corner. We were going down the slippery slope fast, hopefully we have hit the bottom and are about to head back up. Slightly will be just adequate, a bit more would be better.