Defiant, rude & disrespectful 15 year old daughter

[abbstepmom]

Hello, I am looking for advice on how to handle an out of control teen. She is 15 and literally thinks she is grown and can do whatever the heck she wants. Including smoking, drinking, smoking weed, sneaking out, sexually active, trying to get pregnant, attitude out of this world, cussing, fighting, etc. I don't know what to do anymore and don't know how to handle it.

[Taylor-RO]

Hi @abbstepmom, we are sorry to hear that you are facing all of these challenges at the moment. It sounds like you are in such a difficult position. I am wondering if you have thought of speaking to a therapist about these types of issues? It could be a session by yourself.. or one that includes your daughter (if she would agree to go along). Families are really complex and often a lot of factors underlie teenage behaviour so it can be difficult to provide advice without a lot of context or history. I am also wondering whether your daughter's school has any resources or support available?

You are most welcome to use our service but please know that as we are Australian based, we don't have referrals and resources for other countries. We are based on community support and often other parents will comment with their suggestions and advice soon

[Ricrac]

it’s impressive that she has a part time job! YoU’re doing something right there! Might be worth trying to reduce the number of issues you choose to argue with her on..... do an experiment and pretty well ignore some of the annoying ( but not life threatening) issues. Eg Let her choose whether she wants to shower or not. And sometimes all you can do is tell her calmly and caring my what you expect...... and then just breathe deeply if she doesn’t want to listen. I’ve got an obnoxious teenager too.... so I’m not saying there’s any magic. But I remember lots of Marly kids from school who turned into lovely adults a few years later.