My 16 year old doesnt have any friends

[LadyM]

I really think its taking a toll on her. We moved to a new area 2 years ago. I needed to get away from the dangerous city life so that meant leaving close family and friends. I dont drive so once we left, it wasnt much of a way to get back unless i pay for uber or lyft which is expensive. Anyway we are well over a month into school and she hasnt made one friend. She says she cant relate to the girls and she feels out of place. Most of the girls wear makeup, lashes and curse and my daughter doesnt do any of that. she like roblox and video games. I reached out to the guidance counselor who supposedly introduced her to some friends but the girls dont talk to my daughter. Yes school is about learning but what teen wants to go to school every single day without one friend to talk to? 

After school activities arent an option because she would have no way to get home. Again i dont drive and cant afford a vehicle right now. There is no public transportation that goes to or from her school. It's just she and i. I'm starting to feel like moving was a huge mistake and im not sure what to do. I feel so bad for her. Its really taking a huge toll on her mental and things have become super tense between us. Any suggestions please im open to anything.

[Emily-RO]

Hi @LadyM Thank you for sharing this with us. It sounds like a really difficult time for you both right now.

I'm glad to hear that you reached out to the guidance counselor and that you're willing to share your experiences here.

I personally can see a number of similarities between myself and your daughter. I love things like Roblox and am often uninterested by makeup. It's hard when you can't find people with similar interests, and it's especially hard at school when peer pressure is prevalent.

Something that may help is to support her to find people who like Roblox and video games outside of school. For me, the thing that really helped my mental health was finding people that were like-minded. There are a number of "Girls' Coding Course in Roblox" groups online where she can not only meet other young people who have shared interests, but also learn!

Apart from finding community spaces for your daughter, I was wondering if you or her would consider engaging with a professional to help with the emotions or navigating your relationship?

It's really lovely to hear that you care so much for her and are asking for support. I know there are a number of other parents on these forums that have similar experiences and I'm sure they will share.

Thank you again.