Hey @Charlie72 and thanks so much for being so brave and sharing what's going on for you. First of all I'd like to say how beautiful it is to read how accepting you'd be of your daughter if she were to transition. It sounds like you really do care and want the best for your daughter, but that at the moment, you're feeling a little worried about potentially not knowing your daughter well enough. It certainly is confronting when we feel like we know someone but then they do something that surprises us, something that is completely out of character. It's definitely can be a shock.
I'm not sure what your daughter has said/done in the chat-room to make you feel so on edge, so all I can really say is to speak to your daughter when feeling calm, and avoid talking to her when you feel riled up. I think speaking to her in a calm, collected way about what you've found will have the best results.
I think it's good that you decided to let your daughter talk to you when she's ready. I guess she's probably feeling quite overwhelmed with trying to come to terms with her identity and sexuality at the ripe, young, vulnerable age of 13. So it's probably a good idea to give her some space and like you said, let her chat when she feels up to it. All you can do is continue to be the supportive, nonjudgmental mum that you have been, remind her that you love her no matter what, and hope that this pays off in the end.
Have you spoken to anyone else about how you're feeling or received any professional support?
