How to stay connected with your teen and let them have privacy with friends

[Advice101]

I find it hard to stay connected with my teen and social media.  I get they want privacy with their friends. However, there has to be boundaries and to share their life with family at some point.... I am not sure how to get involved without getting too involved and upsetting our relationship.

[PapaBill]

hi @Advice101 

One of the hardest things with children as they grow is knowing how an when to let them have their independence.  How old is your teen?  What is good supervision at 13 is an overbearing parent at 18  

Social media means different things to different people.  How the parents and children see it are vastly different.  To many teens it is a part of who they are and how they express themselves.

Have you considered why you want to be connected with them? 

Is it because you find it an easy way to communicate with them?

Is there behaviour you have seen that you want to address?   

Is it just a general fear of exposing your teens to the social media world without preparation?

Irrespective of your point of view...  I would suggest that education for anyone using social media is critical.  There are dangers in social media, for example - Trolls, permanency of posts etc.  Ask any number of politicians, movie stars or other celebrities who have run fowl of public opinion after their social media history has been reviewed.

I presume you wont be supervising their social media when they are 25?

So sometime between now and then you need to be equipping them to fly solo - educate them now and help them understand the risks and pit falls of social media as well as it benefit and attractions.

IMHO specific strategies depend to how old your child is and what behaviours you are seeing.

Hope that helps.

[Jay-RO]

Hey there @Advice101, 

How have things been going with you and your teen? It can definitely be tricky to stay connected with teens as social media can become a big part of their lives. @PapaBill has already provided some excellent advice on some tips and questions you can ask yourself to help stay connected with your teenager, have you had a chance to think over the questions?

If you're interested, ReachOut also has an article over here that talks about teens and social media, as well as some tips and tricks you can try.