Sleep time Dramas

[Turtle]

Hi I’m new to this site but it seems great so far just need to work it out .... my partner has two children with a lot of problems being from a broken family with issues too many to mention here but I don’t know how much more I can take ... one issue is bedtime.. the 7 year old will not go to bed without my partner in his room. We have to turn everything off and say we are all going to bed me in a separate room so he can sleep with his dad but he also will not go to sleep unless his dad is asleep as well .. we have tried him in his own room but he will not stay on his own or even get into bed without his dad there ... please does anyone have any advice? I am desperate to be able to sit up with my partner and watch tv or talk ... there is no adult time without my partner sneaking out at 10.30 or later once the boy is asleep soundly ... this has to stop but the little one does have so many fears and anxieties we can’t make it worse and as my partner only has them every second weekend he wants everything to be smooth but surely this is not the way to go? The ten year old does anything to stay up including starting a serious conversation with her dad as soon as bedtime hits ... I am at my wits end ..... thanks any help appreciated

[taokat]

Hey @Turtle, it sounds like bedtime is hard work for you and your partner at the moment. That must be so difficult for you. ReachOut is for parents of 12-18 year olds so I'm concerned we won't have the age appropriate help you're needing, but there are a couple of other forums for parents of younger kids. One is Raising Children Network that may be more relevant for you. 

I hope you can find a resolution to your situation as I can imagine you'd love to have your evenings with your partner while the kids are there. All the best.

[Ngaio-RO]

Hi @Turtle

Can I ask how long you've had this set up for? Just because I know that sometimes kids, especially of that age and younger, can take a while to adjust to new arrangements. So f it's new it might just take a little bit longer for him to become used to it.

How do you get along with the 7 year old? Could you offer to do the bedtime routine instead, by offering something like reading to him?

[Arsen01]

hello alll,, yes I guess everyone can have dramatic thoughts before sleeping

[Turtle]

What other forums are out there? Thanks

[taokat]

Hi @ Turtle, the one I mentioned earlier was Raising Children Network, but if you do a google search you can find one that you may prefer if RCN isn't favourable for you. 

Please don't feel unwelcome here, it's purely that I'm concerned being a site for parents of teens you may not get the relevant support you need.