14 year old son won't listen

[Carol637]

My 14 year old son wants to run with older boys in cars when I give a time to come home he just doesn't listen and stays out as later as he wants. If I say he can't go out he wreaks things in house shouts at me and shouts in My face says he hates me and doesn't want to live with me anymore . He says he wants to kill himself and its all my fault because I won't let him have a life .I'm scared of what he might get up to with the older fellas and at 3/4 in the morning I don't know what to do anymore help

[Philippa-RO]

Hi @Carol637 and welcome to the forums - we're really glad you've reached out here for support.

It sounds like such a stressful time for you - as a parent to teens myself I can only imagine how worried you must be feeling about your son. Do you have supportive people around you who you can talk to?

Does your son have any professional supports or services he can access?
As another option, I'm wondering if you have any mentoring programs in your area that he might be interested in - for example something like Big Brothers Big Sisters or Aunties and Uncles?

It's so obvious how much you care about your son, and how dearly you want to keep him safe. 
I'm sorry it's so difficult to communicate those things to him right now. 
We're here for you any time you need to talk. 

[Carol637]

We don't have much support his father works away from home and we ate both only child so no aunts or uncles . His anger got that bad today he hit me but now says its my fault because I won't let him out to be happy with his friends the reason I said he couldn't go out is because the last 2 nights he didn't come home till 1 in the morning then 3 in the morning last night

[Sophia-RO]

Hi @Carol637, sorry to hear that you don’t have much support you at the moment. Things sounds really tough for you right now. I’m sorry to hear that your son became angry and hit you. Are you feeling concerned about your safety or the safety of anyone else in the house currently? Would you feel comfortable reaching out to your son’s school counsellor for support around how your son has been behaving?