Coming up, I always heard the saying, "It takes a village to raise a man," and though this was not my first choice of action in getting through to my son, it was that phrase that led me to this method. My son is 17 years old and will be 18 in 8 months. He has somehow convinced himself that he needs no one and has a plan to survive at 18. He was so cruel to his mother that she had to remove him from the home with his two younger brothers and we decided he come live with me in a different state. He has spent 6 of his 17 years living with me. Every time he goes to stay with her for school breaks, I always get a phone call from her about something terrible he's done, and a story of how he has ruined a holiday event or family "get-together," or even just the peace in her home. I feel like I've given him enough lectures to write a novel, yet he doesn't grasp how things actually work. One example is he was struggling in high school and at risk of not graduating on time, so I decided to place him in an alternative school. While we are making a steady pace he barely maintains higher than a 2.0 GPA yet made the comment, "I've considered going to college one day." Besides trying to explain to him getting into college is a lot more difficult than "deciding to go," I don't even know how to explain to him having a below average High School record is eliminates most college and makes it more difficult to make it into. He has decided at 18 that he wants to be a 911 dispatcher, I've explained to him he must first work on his social skills and he doesn't understand that socializing with his friends, teachers, and family, is a lot different than socializing with the general public. He can't even go into a store or order food without talking low and being socially awkward; and that's not to mention the fact that he has no job experience. A friend of the family let him hold a sign at a local furniture store they ran for side money and doesn't understand until you fill out an I-9, you don't have a "job." I also don't think he understands filling out an application doesn't just lead to a job; not only are you interviewed to evaluate your skills, but you are compared to the other candidates that applied for the job, and the most qualified gets hired. I have also recently found out he has been picking on his 15 year old brother for working at McDonalds, whom, filled out the application, nailed the interview, and recently opened up a checking account. I also can't seem to get him to understand that when you are a teenager with no job. Your job is cleaning the home. You don't always get rewarded for your contribution to the household. It is the very way you pull your weight. I know many may feel this method may be unorthodox, cruel, and probably won't agree with it, but I was hoping everyone could share their own opinions, suggestions, experience converting to adulthood, or even accomplishments their teens or teens they know have completed or been working on; because at the end of the day I have 8 months to not only convince my son that he's not ready for 18, but to explain to him that he is actually astronomically behind. He's burned several bridges and doesn't even realize that even though the plan was for him to go back to moms after graduating, that has been taken off the table. His choices are actually narrowing down to the Military or a program like JobCorp. Counseling did little to nothing, and although I'm a firm believer in learning through the Social Comparison Theory, he's invented his own biased way of comparing himself to others. We will go over the comments together. Thank you all for your time. ... View more