Firstly, you are not a lousy parent, it’s not your fault and you are not alone.  Unfortunately there are more and more teens suffering with mental health issues.  I sympathise with you, I have a 17 yr old daughter who is diagnosed with OCD and ASD, I also have a 15yr old daughter who unfortunately is in care, who is diagnosed with ASD,ODD and emotional dysregulation.  My 17 year old never self-harmed but my 15 year old has and still does.  Last year my 15 year old had approximately 10 hospital admissions in such a short period of time, we could not longer keep her safe.  It got to a stage where we had locks on every door of the house as she would access anything to self-harm with, prior to going into care we had 2:1 carers 24/7 living in our home for a period of 5 weeks to keep her safe and out of hospital.   In our daughters case we felt something happened outside of our house,  she now  requires trauma therapy to address her issues.  Which she is due to start soon.  Our daughter in the beginning wouldn’t open up to us, she was very deep and didn’t express verbally how she was really feeling, she hid behind her smile.   Before going into care she started to open up, I tried not to react even though some of the things she told me, horrified me. Try to talk to your daughter, try to find out why she is feeling this way, let her know that whatever she shares with you, you will listen and be supportive, try not to be judgemental, even if she shares something you disapprove of.    Social media and phone’s although brilliant on one hand, on the other have a lot to answer for, the increase in  children’s mental health,  it’s too much for some children to deal with, I feel social media is the number one cause for the rise in children’s mental health issues.   your not a lousy parent, this isn’t normal day to day  parenting this is extremely challenging for anyone, the OCD alone is challenging,  seek as much help as you can, but at all cost avoid social services!   Does your daughter tell you when she has self-harmed?,  the reason I ask is our daughter used to tell us, it became habit forming, a cry for help, the way she expressed herself, she needed help but could not express what it was she needed help with.  Even when she was in a good place she used to collect and conceal items for when she was feeling low.  She used to take pencil sharpeners apart, razors, it became where everything  in our home was locked up, we also had to lock up all medication, as she had taken overdoses of her own meds.    Remember you are doing your best in such a trying time, don’t feel guilty, just try to be there and listen.  I wish I could advise you more, however I do resinste with some of the feeling you are having because I myself feel like I have failed, why couldn’t I keep my daughter safe in her own home, I have to try to remind myself we did our best.  I do feel a  let down by the system because although both of my children are supported by CAMHS, with my younger daughter it wasn’t enough, more funding needs to be put into mental health for our children preventing them getting to crisis point.         Try to stay positive, your not alone ... View more