Hi. I’m 33 and have 3 kids of my own and I’m a few months into a new relationship. Because of certain situations we had to move in together very quickly. I moved in with him and his 10 yr old son. My youngest is with us daily but my older two come on the weekends because I don’t live in the same school district at the moment or I’d get them more. So we moved in to his place that was just him and his son right after thanksgiving and it hasn’t been easy. This boys mom sucks and has turned him into a jerk. This kid is difficult to the max and had been for years. To the point schools have kicked him out and at 6 dad had to sit at school with him for weeks because his behavior was out of control. I go out of my way to treat this kid just like my own and make his life better but it’s never good enough he’s always miserable and combative and disruptive. No matter what we do this kids never happy. He purposely drives everyone nuts and treats us rudely but wants things. I have had a hard life from childhood up and I finally find a person that I need and makes me happy and makes my whole world better but it’s getting to the point I can’t stand his son being around. I know he knows how bad his son is we talk and are very open. He needs breaks from him himself. I let him know how much I’m struggling with this I don’t want him to ruin our relationship. I beat my self up for feeling this way about a child and I try to reach out to this kid but he does everything possible to drive everyone nuts, he constantly running and jumping around the house, climbing furniture, getting into my kids stuff when they aren’t around(stealing, breaking, ruining), making messes everywhere like a toddler, ruins every outing with his none stop complaining and crying that he’s not having everything just the way he wants it, has a smart mouth and never shuts up, never listens to anyone, had to be the center of attention all the time, can be a rude jerk to everyone but anyone looks at him wrong it’s the end of the world. He’s constantly starting stuff with my kids to the point my kids won’t want to be here and see their mom because he makes it so unbearable. It broke my heart Christmas my one kid was not able to be there and he was so bad my other two didn’t want to spend the rest of the day with me. My oldest is 13 and she try’s even with this kid and he just makes it so hard. We were hoping he was just transitioning but there’s no light in sight. My youngest was having issues when we first moved in but has come around and my bf and her have bonded and get along great now and I wish I could have that with him but it’s not happening. Like I feel like a **bleep** but this kids already like one step away from his dad sending him to military school and at this point im hoping he does or starts spending more time with his mom at this point the only break I get is when his mom decides to be a mom. I feel like I should be able to relate to this kid I had a shifty childhood and his mom has put him threw a lot but even being abused I never treated anyone like this or even acting like this I don’t get it. I just feel like I finally found my happily ever after and it’s being ruined by him and I feel like a **bleep**ty person for just wishing he didn’t have a kid and I didn’t have to deal with this. If you knew all the **bleep** I’ve been threw the last yr you would know how this is alot. I just want to be happy for once and I am just not when this kids around and I live with him so I will take any advice you can offer. I do discuss this with my therapist as well. Sometimes I feel like I try and try and get no where and other times I feel like I’m stubborn and don’t want to like him or connect as I do have my own issues cptsd and adhd but no matter what it is I need to figure out a way to fix this. I feel like **bleep** because ya my kids aren’t perfect but I can handle them and the things they do so much better I’m hoping with time this will all get better.
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