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How do i help my son without showing favoritism?

Discussion forum for parents in Australia

How do i help my son without showing favoritism?

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Active scribe
FarGoneConcl

Re: How do i help my son without showing favoritism?

Hi again @LittleWren ! xx

 

Thank you for all of this its very warming to get on and read all this support even if its only a fraction of my day! xx

 

Of course please don't feel like you're pressuring me or acting like you know it all, I'm happy to hear advice, criticism and of course personal experience, hindsight is a powerful thing even if it isn't my own!

 

Unfortunately with my son he shuts off when you ask him for anything that takes what he would see as too much effort. He seems happy whenever he makes a small sale.. but asking him to organise a spreadsheet for costs of making a product so he knows how much profit there is that can be used for the business, or asking him how his advertising ideas are going, or his brother asking him what his plans are for writing sections of the business he just blows up with 'I don't know' or 'you know I'm not good at that sort of stuff' or completely goes silent treatment on us. I know he wants it to work but he doesn't seem to understand that having a self employed business usually requires the person to work their but off all day on the clock and as much time out of hours researching, preparing, brainstorming etc. 

 

Gosh I always feel like I'm rambling, have a good day everyone ill check back in later hopefully. Can't wait for the weekend! xx

Super contributor
Taylor-RO

Re: How do i help my son without showing favoritism?

Hi @LittleWren, thank you so much for taking the time to show support to others. Some of your suggestions are really thoughtful and practical which I am sure will be beneficial to parents who come across this thread. You're so right about brainstorming Smiley Happy

 

Getting kids off the Xbox can be a tough one for sure! I read through your post which detailed how you talked to your son, especially regarding favouritism and I really love your approach so thank you for sharing. I think being honest is great (even if it is difficult sometimes) as it shows them that you are taking their concerns seriously and are truly listening. I agree with what you said about finding a 'back of house' job, as it is true that everyone will suit a different type of role and it is important to lean into that. A young person I know who was not interested in client facing roles went into a cleaning role instead. Hopefully you are able to get those resumes handed out! 

Hi @FarGoneConcl, best of luck getting through to your oldest! You mentioned that your son shuts off when you ask questions about his business. Do you think he would have the same reaction if you were to offer to listen to his ideas, brainstorm ideas or help him plan out his ideas? This might have been something you have already tried or mentiond but I just thought I would check Smiley Happy

A lot of physical, mental and emotional effort goes into dealing with problems and brainstorming suggestions. With everything that you have got going on, I wouldn't blame you if you felt exhausted and stressed out. Have you either thought of talking to a professional to feel a bit more supported? Sometimes it is nice to have a safe space to share whenever you feel the need. Yes the weekend is finally here! Are you doing anything for it?

Casual scribe
koldobrew

Re: How do i help my son without showing favoritism?

Have you started working with a child psychologist?