My 15 year old son has been arrested 3 times for marijuana, drug paraphernalia, and alcohol.

[Scaredmom]

I have tried working with other parents, the school, and his coaches. No one wants to get involved. This is a small town and people know what is going on. Everything is kept very quiet and people are angry at me for speaking up and addressing the problem.

[4mybabies]

thats sad that they are upset with you, as your son may not be the only one struggling with these issues and it could benefit other kids by speaking up about it. 

[Sister]

Hi @Scaredmom,

Living in the small town seems to be difficult for you at the moment.

Is your son willing to go to a counsellor or doesn't he see his substance misuse as an issue?

If you cannot get any assistance in your town, it might be worth making an appointment to see someone in a bigger town. There are also the phone help lines that should be able to assist you. Also read as much as you can about marijuana and alcohol in teenagers so you can help your son.

Take Care

[desmondo]

Oh no that is awful.  My daughter (now just 16) is very similar.  Luckily she hasnt been caught by the police but I have told her that she runs the risk of being apprehended sooner or later.

I wonder though, either the local town cop really has his finger on the pulse of everything that goes on in the town ... or could it be that it's a bit of a cry for help or attention the fact he has been caught not once but 3 times?

It's also tough as a parent when everybody around you know exactly what badness your kid is up to ... it's humiliating.  But you know what, there are some people and parents who understand that its not because you're a bad parent or that your kid is necessarily a bad egg - it's just a horrible angsty confused phase that happens to some kids ... we have found a lot of support and people who have gone through similar or have nephews etc that this has happened to.  We have found a few of the other sort who have no idea and who instantly judge us ... to those I say just stuff them, I'm glad they have outed themselves as judgemental bigots because I have no interest in being friends with them.  And I look at some of their younger kids and wonder if they wont perhaps be in a similar position to me in a year or two ... let's talk then!

[taokat]

Hey @Scaredmom, thank you for sharing your situation with us. It must be highly frustrating for you that others don't want to face the real issues and offer support. I think you're doing the right thing though, as @4mybabies said, it could help others as well. But I can imagine it'd be a hard slog for you facing so much resistance.  

I can see by your username that you're in the US, and being an Australian site we're unable to assist you with local resources. However, as you can see, the community welcomes you! I'm not sure if you've had a look at any of ReachOut's info, but here is a link with some great info about teenagers and alcohol you might be interested in reading over. You'll see it also gives some 'things to try'. 

Have you had successes with your son's issues since first posting?