Hi there @Boohughes ,
Thank you for sharing what's been happening for you. It sounds like a lot to contend with at home, especially when the constant arguing is between two teenagers - I guess we can say they aren't small children any more who you can separate!
While reading your post, I'm wondering whether you have sat each boy down separately and tried to talk to them about what's going on for them so that they feel such strong anger towards their sibling? While it may be true that sibling rivalry is 'natural' and 'healthy' to some extent, from what you are describing, it sounds like this is getting a little beyond that point. I hear how much it is affecting the entire family. I wonder if it is worth while sharing this ReachOut article with them? This article talks about conflict with family and tips on working through the conflict.
Do the boys have times when they have their own space? That is, they are not together at home e.g. one has extra curricular activities, or spends time out with friends or a parent? This may give them an opportunity to open up to a trusted person.
ReachOut have a free 1:1 Parent Coaching course. Many parents and carers find this program very useful as they navigate the ups and downs of raising teenagers.
In all this, please look after yourselves. Keep practising those BIG PARENT breaths and know you are not alone by watching this short video clip of a mother who tries to STAY CALM 
We look forward to hearing from you!
