Troublesome Teenagers

[Lippylinz]

Anyone having problems with their teenage daughters.  I am losing the will and as I struggle with mental health it is really taking its toll. I have had to take her mobile phone off her, so I am the worst person ever.  I have asked her friend to stop sending streaks on Snapchat for her, so I am now double worst person ever.  Please tell me there is someone else out their suffering with how to deal with their children and taking it personally.  Its so upsetting. @gina-Ro @Nelsonhyman @St_George- 

[Lilly19]

You are in good company! The greatest %of parents will experience these behaviours through the teen years. One thing I have learnt through education of the teenage brain development is not to take away their phones.. It is their connection to the world and without it depression and anxiety with no access to their rocks is a worse outcome. We are no longer important to them they know everything and they are ashamed of us. Remember we were teens once, horrible times. 

Mine keep their phones no matter what they do. They have a major punishment and know that they will not be attending their favourite thing. It happened to my suicidal girl a few wks ago and she wasn't a happy camper. 

Find what really makes them happy and use it as your tool to guide her.

I hang by a thread I have a large support team keeping me alive atm. They are there 24/7. My kids put their number on speed dial so they can ring them to get me help. Breathe, you are by no means alone.

[Soulmama]

You are doing a great job. It can be hard to not take things personally but we have to. Parenting troublesome teens requires very thick skin! I totally relate as am in the same situation. 13 yo daughter who is constantly pushing boundaries, is disrespectful and engaged in risk taking behaviours. I shut down data and she keeps phone. It's the only way I can keep in contact if she's not home. Snapchat streaks do my head in. What an evil, insidious lure to keep our kids addicted to their phones.
I turn WiFi off sometimes hiding modem. It's the only currency I have left.

[Lippylinz]

Thanks so much for your replies, I'm glad im not alone. Things have calmed down for the minute so hopefully my actions have won the day xx

[Jess1-RO]

Hi there @Lippylinz @Soulmama @Lilly19 

We have had young people answer a question about "How much phone time is okay for a teen?" which is now live today. It is a little bit different to the snapchat topic, but I would really love to hear your thoughts about screen time, snapchat and strategies you use for phones in general.

We have a chat started on the question thread if you would like to jump in