Worries with 13 year old boy

[lizard0812]

Thanks @Schooner I appreciate the support cause not everybody understands. Mental health sure is in crisis in our teens and everybody really it’s so sad and hard. The lack of routine etc I’m worried about and when both parents work full time it’s stressful but we will c what we can sort out. We couldn’t continue the way it was even for another two weeks

[lizard0812]

i Am struggling massively at the moment with my own feelings of trust for my 13 year old boy. Things have been settled for the last week but I have this constant fear and worry that something bad is going to happen. I feel sick 24/7 I struggle to sleep I struggle to keep focused at work. I’m just going through emotional hell 24/7. It’s like I can’t enioy the good times with him anymore cause I’m always on edge waiting for something bad to happen. I feel like I’m going crazy. How do others handle this.

[Schooner]

Hi @lizard0812,

It took me a long time to get over those feelings (months). For a long time I felt that my son was better, but I was not. I had some paperwork to do about a year after he got better, relating to a complaint we put in about the school, and it brought it all back again. At the same time my son got better and better. That's still going on.

For me it wasn't so much trust in my son, but the fear that his improvement was yet another false start, and that he would go backwards again. We had so many false starts.

I tried to get a little distance from my son and me. We'd been together for what seemed like 24/7 for a long time, and we were probably both a little sick of each other. I took advantage of opportunities for him to stay with relatives and friends whenever possible. I caught up with old friends. I tried to exercise. I tried not to drink too much. I did some volunteer work one evening a week (and found some very sympathetic ears there, by accident). I tried to sleep properly (when he was bad I was getting up 3-5 times a night to check he was still in his bed, I have not quite shaken that habit of getting up).

So, I don't have any genius tips to offer. Hang in there. Go through the motions of life. As long as he gets better, it gets better (but it is slow, and you might lag behind him).

 Merry Christmas @lizard0812

[Lan-RO]

Hi @lizard0812 I'm sorry to hear of your struggles and that you are constantly feeling on edge. I'm wondering if you have any supports in place for yourself or if you could speak to a Counsellor on eHeadspace or Lifeline? Both have phone and webchat support available. It's good to hear things have been settled for the last week with your boy. It's important to get some support for the fears and concerns you have been experiencing. We're here for you