Young adult girl with adhd

[Banjo14]

Hello. I have a daughter who is 21 as battery diagnosed with ADHD depression and anxiety for sometime now it’s been very hard to communicate she had two very big moments in her life which has exacerbated the depression and anxiety we can’t seem to communicate she lives seven hours away from us and I need strategies to be able to stay close to her

[Natalie-RO]

Hey @Banjo14 

Thank you for reaching out and sharing this with us.

It is understandable how concerning it would be to not be able to communicate with your daughter and having her live far away from you, especially when her depression and anxiety has exacerbated.

Is your daughter receiving any support for her ADHD, depression and anxiety from either a GP or mental health professional?

I was also wondering if you've tried speaking to your daughter about your concerns and if you've tried to talk about the communication with her?

I wanted to share this article we have on effective communication which may be helpful, it includes a list of things to try. Do you think any of these might be helpful to try? We also have a coaching service for parents, where you can speak to a family professional one on one and get some support. You can find more about it here.

As your daughter lives far away from you, I was wondering whether your daughter has any other family or friends for support that live near her?

[blackcatbex]

I don't have those answers for you. But i feel your fear, I feel the urgency you do to try and support a daughter with mental health issues.
My daughter has had mental health issues since she was 3 years old.
Not many people can see it at such a young age. But I did as her mother.
I'm heartbroken for her. I really do understand how you are feeling xxx

[Iona_RO]

Hi @blackcatbex 

Thank you so much for sharing your support for another parent, it always helps to know others understand and you're not the only one going through something

I'm sorry to hear that you're feeling heartbroken for your daughter, it must've been really tough for you to support her from such a young age. How old is your daughter now? Were you able to find supports to help you both?

[blackcatbex]

It's been a really tough journey for her the last 18 months.
Last year we had to take her out of school, she just turned 10.
She sees a psychologist regularly, is currently undergoing diagnostic testing, and waiting on a paediatrician appointment which is 4 months away.
She has chronic anxiety, panic attacks, OCD tendencies, aggressive outbursts, socially inappropriate behaviour.
It's very hard for people to understand.
I have a Beautiful support group with some very close friends. And she has finally found a couple of really good friends that understand and love her no matter what.
But even as a parent, I've had to set very tight boundaries with other people. I've weeded out toxic and judgemental people, and won't allow them in our lives because they upset the stress level scales for me as a struggling parent, and for her too.
I'm very lucky to be on a small property where we have lots of animals, and horses. They have been her saving grace.
I've worked very hard to make it her safe space, and a place of serenity, and we do alot of riding and horse therapy. She is just so very talented with them. I'm very proud of her.
But every day is a struggle. And it can be so very heartbreaking to see what she goes through everyday.