Roast Me!

[Ngaio-RO]

It's a valid question @taziness 

Is it us? Are we just missing the joke?

[Maggiemay]

I just spoke to my teenage son who said he thinks it's funny.  I asked him does he think it is bullying and he says that people are putting themselves up there to be roasted.  I asked if he would put himself up there and he said yes.  He would love to see what people would say about him.  In saying that he does not take things people say to heart - especially people who don't know him.

I had a look at the site and I must say I'm amazed at some of the comments that people make.  I have to wonder where they come up with some of the comments they do.  My mind just does not go to the places theirs does and I am so happy about that.

I also have to wonder if some of those comments could be a trigger for someone who has  previously not been affected by insults.

My other concerns are what restrictions are put on this site.  Can anyone any age post and comment on this.  There is obviously no privacy restrictions so who is actually getting hold of your picture and then what other information can they get.

Not a fan of roast me. 

[Ngaio-RO]

Thanks for sharing your son's perspective @Maggiemay It's so interesting to hear he wouldn't care.

[taziness]

Thanks for sharing, it's a strange culture alright ;( My teenage girls interestingly and fortunately can't understand it either! Might make the 8pm chat if this headache goes away

[taokat]

Wow! I just cannot fathom why someone would create such a thing! For people who are very self assured and secure within themselves, it seems a narcissistic way of testing that confidence and laughing at those who try to diminish that confidence.

For kids like mine who are finding themselves, and who can sometimes be very hateful towards themselves, it seems a very dangerous tool. Thinking of my daughter, I can imagine her on a bad day going on there in self loathing. To have people come back to her confirming her insecurities or negative thoughts, and adding even more, could be very damaging for her. And there are plenty of kids like mine, just as sensitive and vulnerable to degradation. 

I'm all for a campaign! Am I just getting old and don't get it? Maybe so! With age comes wisdom though, and I fail to see anything positive or motivational in this trend.

Thank you for sharing Ngaio.

[taokat]

Good suggestion @taziness. I'm going to research it and write a blog on my website. I also though I might contact The Project and broach the idea of a feature about it. I think it might be something they'd be interested in. What do you think?

[taokat]

Topic created - 'Has your teen taken part in the 'Roast Me' phenomenon?'

I thought it would be great to get some feedback from parents on their experiences and what their teens motivations were for participating, from either contributor or 'commentor' (new word for 2017?).

I'd also like to gauge parents support for greater education on the negative impacts of such behaviour.

[taziness]

I'll keep an eye on your new topic post as I'm interested the responses too! After asking each youth that I encounter about it, interestingly, none have engaged with it (or Reddit much for that matter) and few had actually heard about it, so I would be interested to know who the using cohort actually is.

I have moved my own attention to mainly the 'body loathing phenomenon' and have also created a site (among other very active efforts on the ground!), though not a blog. Just a facebook page where I can collect and share resources with the young, targeting my home state.

I have also started a newsletter which I email out to local schools, councils and organisations in hope of making some of these issues more well known. Sooooo much goes under the radar in this WWW (Wacky and Wild World of Internet!!)

[taokat]

Hi @taziness, I'm wondering how your newsletter went and what sort of reaction you got?

Do you mind sharing your facebook page and I'm happy to help promote it.

[taokat]

Well I've had a very interesting time since my last comment. I decided to do some research to find out people's thoughts on 'Roast Me', with very saddening results. Firstly I haven't had a huge response from parents or the public, but from comments I've had most people say it is comedy and people ask for it so they ask for whatever comments are left. The moderators encourage people to leave the harshest of comments and because of the question I asked in the askreddit sub, that hatred came my way! 

I also asked the moderators how they moderate the page to determine hate from comedy - it's all just personal judgement on comments but nothing is actually classed as hate - they all think it's smart comedy, as they use the site to roast others themselves. I've been trolled and bullied by the moderators and by the users of Roast Me. I asked the question on Quora which was reported back to the moderators who contacted me to let me know they knew about it.

What I've found most curious and disturbing about the whole thing, is that the moderators say if you can't handle being roasted, don't go to the site. Yet just because I've asked the public their opinion, it's created such a stir and made one moderator in particluar very angry - doesn't show a secure personality. How does one handle the horrific and hateful things posted, yet be so sensitive about a simple question being asked? 

Kids as young as 13 are encouraged to participate in the roasting of others. 16 years olds and up can post a picuture asking to be roasted, but no proof of age is required. Some of the kids look 12, it's shocking.

So bullies are everywhere, and gang up against their target. I've found it quite intimidating and upsetting. Imagine how misguided youngsters could be affected. 

I asked a friend to help me set up a subreddit called Build Me Up, but was told it was a lame and a dumb idea. I don't have the skills to set it up, as there is a lot that goes into setting up a subreddit from what I can gather.

I'm still going to write an article, but what an unhealthy experience for me putting the question out there! The backlash was extreme and it's not a area of the internet I want to delve into again, just for that reason.