New member? Introduce yourself here!

[Ngaio-RO]

Hi @Graeme

Thank you so much for taking the time to introduce yourself!

I'm really sorry to hear how difficult things are for you at the moment. It can be devestating when our children stop speaking to us.

If you're interested, here is some info about effective listening and how to do it. Which might sound weird considering the communication is cut but it can make a huge difference to rebuilding the relationship if you're able to help him feel heard during any interaction you have together, no matter how small.

Please feel free to go here and start a topic about what's going on for you. There are parents here who have been through similar things or can relate. It's amazing what a difference it can make when you realise you're not alone. 

[Ngaio-RO]

Hello @AnnAnn @alant @momof2girls & @Melinda 

Welcome to ReachOut Parents!

If you could take a moment to introduce yourself and answer these questions, that would be wonderful!

1. How old are your kids and what is one thing they've done recently that made you laugh?
2. Parenting can sometimes mean we end up at the bottom of our own list - what do you do that's just for you?
3. What led you to ReachOut Parents today?
4. If you were making a bumper sticker, what would it say?
5. Favourite celebration and why?

[alant]

1 My son is 16 and I can't remember the last time he made me laugh

2 I keep working to pay the bills

3 Desperation

4 Drugs suck

5 When my son scored his hat trick at cricket. Something I never achieved

[Ngaio-RO]

Welcome @alant Thank you so much for sharing that with us.

Coming here because of desperation sounds like things are really difficult at the moment. What do you think about starting a topic on what's happening for you so the other parents can offer any insight they might have?

If yuou want to but aren't sure HOW to, please just ask.

[Elena]

1. I have three daughters between 12 and 17. They like to laugh at their old daggy Mum, but it is affectionate laughing so it is fine, any laughter during tough times is a victory.

2. I've tried just about everything to help my stress levels Mindfullness, visits to a psychologist, talk to select friends, chat on forums like this, talk to a counsellor, write in a diary, read, and much though I ate to admit it, medication.  But the very best thing that I did, and this was when our situation had eased a bit and I realised that life had seemed to pass us by, was to make a conscious decision to actually live life more fully, so we went on a holiday to an island in the south pacific. We couldn't really afford it, and I left all the details to a travel agent as I didn't have spare headspace for planning, and we just (all of us) went off and made some good memories to replace some of the dismal ones.

3 I came across ReachOut on facebook, and having had a good experience with the ATDT forum for eating disorders I thought I'd say hi here.

4 Be prepared to throw out all the old rules if they are no longer useful. Try to approach any weird, scary, confronting things your teen may do or say, not with anger or fear, but with an attitude of curiosity i.e. " Tell me about that" or "Is there a particular reason you say/do that", this way you can avoid confrontation as much as possible. But also try to treat them with respect, they are emerging adults and it can be a difficult process for them.

5 The kids are starting to spread their wings and we often need to be taxis, but some of our best conversations with the kids can be when there are just two of us in the car, so I use these times to touch base and just informally chat.

[Ngaio-RO]

Thanks for that @Elena there's so many great things in your post!!

The trip to the South Pacific, because you knew it was what you all needed more than anything. What a fabulous idea! I hope it delivered on the good memories.

I also love what you say about "Try to approach any weird, scary, confronting things your teen may do or say, not with anger or fear, but with an attitude of curiosity." This is a wonderful piece of advice. 

I hope we get to hear from you a lot more!

[Ngaio-RO]

Shout out to some new kids on the block! Welcome @workingdad2 @Nicmac @freddo22 & @Baxter2013

If you have a moment please answer these questions, we'd love to learn more about you!

1. How old are your kids and what is one thing they've done recently that made you laugh?
2. Parenting can sometimes mean we end up at the bottom of our own list - what do you do that's just for you?
3. What led you to ReachOut Parents today?
4. If you were making a bumper sticker, what would it say?
5. Favourite celebration and why?

[Ngaio-RO]

• Hey there @Harry @Mum2017 @Nicha 

• 

So great to see you here on ReachOut Parents!

If you have a moment please answer these questions, we'd love to learn more about you!

1. How old are your kids and what's something nice they did for you?
2. What led you to ReachOut Parents today?
3. What app do you use the most?
4. Favourite quote?

[Ngaio-RO]

• Hello @teenbopsmum, @Unsuremummy and @deehogan 
• Welcome to ReachOut Parents! We're very happy to have you here.        

• 

If you have a moment please answer these questions, we'd love to learn more about you!

1. How old are your kids and what's something nice they did for you?
2. What led you to ReachOut Parents today?
3. What app do you use the most?
4. Favourite quote?

[Serapis22]

I am taking on nanny duties i am 54 years old, 16 year old granddaughter going on 17 and her 3 younger brothers ages 8, 7, 5. 1st day of nanny duties teenage granddaughter got into an arguement over something so trivial and I was all to blame as she told her mother, whom by the way works full time and her partner just started working. I was in total shock and was a bit dumb founded. I need help to understand and to help my granddaughter feel good about herself. Thank you